Unique Problem!

we can't jump to conclusion ..

Have anybody tried to understand a girl's view .... who sits whole day at home .. 8:30AM - 9:00 PM .. cleaning ... looking after kids ...only to find a demanding husband home (if he can make it before 12:00PM) ...food and physical and his computes ...where is the emotional support she needs ???

Soumi , our grandparents "lived happily ever after" only on our faces ... grandma was "trained" to be very suppressive .... not asking for any of the grandpa's actions and supporting the whole family like a machine without asking for anything, and if she choses not to do so, she has no supporters not even females will support her. She has to derive happiness out of everyone's happiness but she can't dream for one herself (she doesn't dare to). For Grandma's the whole world is only her family... which is not true.. there is lot more to life than just caring for other .. it should be part of life and not the life. All said and done ... this is simply not possible in today's world and changing environment, the reason's can be HUNDREDS.

On the contrary, if we look at the men's point of view ...they have great responsibility (if they want to take) of supporting the family and being in US as an immigrant. and on the top of that work pressure always eats them up if they want to remain competive. They take their other half "for granted". that she being a sati savitri will always be there for me. But they forget that she is a Modern girl and has demands to and she is not "trained" like her grandma... she is a human too.

Marriage being a social alliance reduces to only two person on weekdays and four friends on weekends .. Its a lot of adjusment for a girl coming fresh in America and taking on the marriage responsibilty. Her life turns 180 degrees ... but mens life (schedule) remains the same.

So you never know what really goes wrong behind the closed doors. If you are married for 4-5 years, small differences in the personal nature also begin to show up ... like one like to watch TV while the other wants to go out.

GCFast .... I am really sorry for your friend .... but I don't think we can blame either him or her .... as you "really" don't know what "each" one is going through ..

Any Women/Men would be stupid to leave a "perfect" relationship if there is no problem underlying ... again you will never know those details ... and every person is opportunists if he/she knows that he/she needs to end this episode of life.


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this is solely my opinion and I don't mean to hurt anyone's feeling .. if I do so please excuse me for the same.
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Yea soumy thats really bad .. can you fix my pc?

I am shocked 140 hasn't commented on this yet !! just SHOCKED.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
GCFasttrac,

This is the most lively thread we have had for a long time,
so it is tempting to throw in our 2c.

I join the majority here - there is no legal point in trying
to reverse the ex-spouse's GC.
More than that: even if there is a way to do it,
I would advise against it.

If the couple had a few good years together, it is
best to concentrate on the good memories
and try to forget the bad ones. This will help picking up
the pieces - for both sides.
There are quite a few more qualified women and men
out there to restart relationship if people can put
themselves back in the right state of mind.

If the couple had nothing but bad times together, then
a divorce is probably a good way out,
and both people should try to think of it as a positive
move in their lives.

So tell your friend ( and the ex-wife, if you are in speaking
terms with her) to try to end this story in a positive way
if at all possible, try to minimize the losses incurred,
and make piece with himself.
Getting back at the other side may be satisfying for a short
while, but for the long run it does not make anyone happy
( except maybe the divorce lawyers).
Yes, it may be unfair to one of the sides, but it is so much
better to be able to move on.

Disclaimer: I am not a lawyer, I am not a marriage counselor,
I am not even Indian.

HR04
 
Waitingforbreak,

This is precisely my point , the day you make man and women equal your problems begin. For Gods sake God did not create man and women equal.The more you dwell into equality the more you will see the same problem. 18th century, 20th century, 21st century or whatever if you follow the principles of a husband/wife realtionship it doesnt change one bit.

1) Husbands love your wife above yourself ,promise to feed and clothe her even if you hunger.

2) Wifes submit ( yes you heard correct) submit to your husband
stand by him in all distress.

These are basic family values if followed leads to a stable life. 21st century by the way doesnt make better families do they?

By the way the wife in this case has spoken the above.Being a lady and adhering to above is what I practice. If Im brandeda 18th century lady so be it.
 
Soumy, thats what the pandit chants in all those mantras.

Anyway, might I add, by submitting to your husband, or by loving your wife, you are not,

a) Being servile, or
b) Not being macho boy.

And no thats not equal in roles, but certainly equal in stature. Go Soumy Go :). Your hubby is hella lucky I bet.

now .. only if you could fix my pc !! :(
 
Hey Silly,

I wish I could fix your PC , if yes I would do it for sure and free. Maybe there are too may jpeg files of JLO delete some and see if it works :)
 
LOL Soumy, I don't want to go to THAT EXTENT.

BTW, my pc hangs on XP poot, it hangs @ MUP.SYS .. any clues? I'm just sick of tearing it apart :(, and I have work to finish.
 
[OT] Fixing the WinXP boot

Originally posted by Silly Man
BTW, my pc hangs on XP poot, it hangs @ MUP.SYS .. any clues? I'm just sick of tearing it apart :(, and I have work to finish.
Click to expand...

Do a quick search on http://www.deja.com (it is Google nowadays) with a phrase "MUP.SYS Windows XP". See if any of those recommendations will help.
 
Oh god .. I mean Oh bitterman, thats the first thing I did .. anyway here's a copy paste of my travails from expertsexchange.com ..

I AM SICK of this problem please help !! :(

I was working on my XP Pro machine, running VS.NET, Winamp, Kazaa, yahoo msnger, msn messenger. And the music quit playing. I glanced at winamp, and the dancing lights were not moving, tried moving my mouse to close it, and mouse wouldn't move .. the pc had a brain freeze. I turned the power off, now it won't boot. Safe mode boot tells me, it hangs on "MUP.SYS". I mean "TOTAL FREEZE".

My config,

AMD 2400+, Asus A78NX Deluxe, DDR333 Kingston Ram 256MB X 2, 60G Western Digital, 120 G Western Digital SE, 200 G Western Digital SE, Promise IDE controller, DVD 8x, CD Writer 32x, ATI 8500 DV display card.

Here is what all I've tried to fix it.

Hardware ..
Pulled ram sticks out, tested one by one in different slots.
Pulled out hdds, pulled out IDE controller,
all kinds of bios settings,

Software ..
It *will* boot fine in DOS/Windows 98.
I tried reinstalling a fresh (and repair existing) XP Pro, Win2K Advanced Server, Win 2003 enterprise server, ... NONE of these, would even install. They all fail where PC restarts, and a blue screen comes up for setup (not crash), at the end of which it says "Setup is starting windows" at the bottom of the screen, and it never starts windows. Oh yea, I've also flashed bios from Asus's website.

I'd be tempted to think it's the display card, but then why does 98 work?
Click to expand...
 
Silly here's the solution

your request for resolving MUP.SYS was received on May 12th, 2003. We are sorry, we are not resolving this issue for all of the cases. Anyways it is taking 965-999 days for us to process this kind of request.

JM
 
Re: Silly here's the solution

Originally posted by junior_member
your request for resolving MUP.SYS was received on May 12th, 2003. We are sorry, we are not resolving this issue for all of the cases. Anyways it is taking 965-999 days for us to process this kind of request.

JM
Click to expand...

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR !!! :mad:
 
yih,

I just saw ur message, and I hope you are outta cultural shock by now. Indian culture, honestly how many ppl truly follow indian culture??? That itself would be a major topic, but don't wanna get into it.
 
Hi,

WOW!!! I didn't expect so many responses on this thread. But nice to see different opinions (even with bad language, guys this is USA, and everyone uses bad language, so get over it).

To be honest, the marriage is all abt commitment, and sacrifices. Well I have read and heard this before so many times. The reality is, being a guy, I don't wanna marry a fucked up girl, and being a girl, you wouldn't wanna marry a fucked guy... of course how would you know the person is fucked up or not, thats a million dollor question.

***** Sorry abt my language, but thats what I am. If you wanna judge me based on this, be my guest. ****
 
Hi,

WOW!!! I didn't expect so many responses on this thread. But nice to see different opinions (even with bad language, guys this is USA, and everyone uses bad language, so get over it).

To be honest, the marriage is all abt commitment, and sacrifices. Well I have read and heard this before so many times. The reality is, being a guy, I don't wanna marry a fucked up girl, and being a girl, you wouldn't wanna marry a fucked guy... of course how would you know the person is fucked up or not, thats a million dollor question.

***** Sorry abt my language, but thats what I am. If you wanna judge me based on this, be my guest. ****
Click to expand...



Thats not a million dollar question, thats just a GC question....
 
reply

I have read some responses in this thread where the woman in a marriage is reffered to with phrases like "SERVILE" and "SUBMITTING"

Among other things the above two phrases refer to sex.

Don't you think that the modern woman enjoys sex and is an active participant ????
 
rsgrc, don't forget laundry.

Just kidding, I don't think servile is right anyway. But hey I'm a guy I wouldn't know a woman's viewpoint.
 
Originally posted by Soumy
I tend to disagree on this. Yes a woman should have ambitions but all that after the first responsibility ie home. A ladyi s meant to set values,grow up responsible children, take care of her husband etc etc. This should be the first priority of every women.Ever wondered why our Grandparents lived good lives free of divorce etc? Simple its the women who knew where the priorities lie. Here guys want more money so they make the women work or women are career oriented and liberated or whatever and so what happens ? the home suffers. Money will come and go a home cannot be brought. A woman can make a home a home worth living. First and foremost all women should get thier priorities right- home first. Men should be the breadwinner and the master of the house. But he should respect his wife. Ofcourse just as when a man looses his joba woman can help out so too a man should help with household chores. But take it from me any house where the women has her home and children as PriorityNo1 is the home we all crave for.

Set your home straight everythig will fall in place
Click to expand...



ARE YOU FOR REAL? India is India because of crackpots like you! This is the 21st century...wake up!!!


Your grandma was perhaps trained to be subservient!!! She had no options then.

If you are a man...your wife should leave you after she gets her GC!!!
 
Honestly Soumy!

Soumy, honestly dear you are an MCP. With that kind of attitude you will only get an anni!! I don't see how a girl could stand that attitude...
 
see now we know what the problem is...so u cant really blame a girl if she leaves a husband like this after she gets her GC..right ?? tit for tat huh ?? ;)

I would not be surprised if I see a post some day from Soumy saying his wife left him after he got his GC and he wants to know what to do now :)

if soumy is a gal then god bless you :)
 
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