Sad story...

D

driven

New Member
Hello There,

Here's my sad story. I was an overstay on a B2 visa for 4 years, when I met the girl whom I married in 2010 april. Everything went fine, I finally got my greencard this January. We rented our on apartment, worked and everything seemed just fine.
Then I made the decision to go travel back to my native country, because I owned a condo there and I wanted to go ahead and sell it, so we can go ahead and invest it, start our life in the US. It took me 3 weeks to get all the paperwork and everything else in order (European bureaucracy…), so I was away for almost 4 weeks.
And here goes the sad part. As soon as I got home, I knew something wasn't right… And I was right. My wife stood up and sad, "I'm 4 weeks pregnant". I didn't know If I wanted to start laugh or cry, but wait… We hadn't been together for 6 weeks, and before that too I used protection (she can't take pills for medical reasons). And yes, she admitted, that she had an affair with a mexican guy, and it had been going on for 2 months.
I still couldn't talk, because of the shock I was in…And when I thought it couldn't get any worse, it did. She shaid, she is not going to abort the baby, she's gonna raise him/her, and love him/her, no matter what. I totally broke down, and I told her, that I couldn't go on with our marriage like this…I just can't…I was sad, and furious at the same time and I told her I want a divorce, I can't do this…I can't raise somebody else's child, plus the cheating, I just can't handle it…just too much. I moved out last week and now I'm staying with my parents in a different state and trying to find a job, so I don't live up all the money that I sold my place for in my country.
I defienetly want a divorce, and here comes the question.
Am I gonna be able too remove the conditions in 2012 with my own? We haven't started the legal separation process yet.
I sold everything I had in my native country, my whole family is here (they're all either USC's or LPR's).
What should I do? I'm gonna make an appointment with a lawyer this week to ask for professional help, but in the meantime, just wanted to get your opinion here, because I don't want to start a whole new life in my country.
Thank you for your kind responses.

PS: Please don't even try to talk mi into couple's therapy and stuff like that, because I'm committed for the divorce, I just can't do this marriage like this, there's no trust plus a little mexican baby…Can't do it.
 
Make sure you don't acknowledge the kid as yours, and do what you can to prevent your name going on the birth certificate as the father. Otherwise, you may be held liable for child support, because normally a child born to a married woman is legally presumed to be the husband's child.
 
driven said:
Hello There,

Here's my sad story. I was an overstay on a B2 visa for 4 years, when I met the girl whom I married in 2010 april. Everything went fine, I finally got my greencard this January. We rented our on apartment, worked and everything seemed just fine.
Then I made the decision to go travel back to my native country, because I owned a condo there and I wanted to go ahead and sell it, so we can go ahead and invest it, start our life in the US. It took me 3 weeks to get all the paperwork and everything else in order (European bureaucracy…), so I was away for almost 4 weeks.
And here goes the sad part. As soon as I got home, I knew something wasn't right… And I was right. My wife stood up and sad, "I'm 4 weeks pregnant". I didn't know If I wanted to start laugh or cry, but wait… We hadn't been together for 6 weeks, and before that too I used protection (she can't take pills for medical reasons). And yes, she admitted, that she had an affair with a mexican guy, and it had been going on for 2 months.
I still couldn't talk, because of the shock I was in…And when I thought it couldn't get any worse, it did. She shaid, she is not going to abort the baby, she's gonna raise him/her, and love him/her, no matter what. I totally broke down, and I told her, that I couldn't go on with our marriage like this…I just can't…I was sad, and furious at the same time and I told her I want a divorce, I can't do this…I can't raise somebody else's child, plus the cheating, I just can't handle it…just too much. I moved out last week and now I'm staying with my parents in a different state and trying to find a job, so I don't live up all the money that I sold my place for in my country.
I defienetly want a divorce, and here comes the question.
Am I gonna be able too remove the conditions in 2012 with my own? We haven't started the legal separation process yet.
I sold everything I had in my native country, my whole family is here (they're all either USC's or LPR's).
What should I do? I'm gonna make an appointment with a lawyer this week to ask for professional help, but in the meantime, just wanted to get your opinion here, because I don't want to start a whole new life in my country.
Thank you for your kind responses.

PS: Please don't even try to talk mi into couple's therapy and stuff like that, because I'm committed for the divorce, I just can't do this marriage like this, there's no trust plus a little mexican baby…Can't do it.
Click to expand...

I am sorry to hear that.
I know it is hard to stay together, but to be on the safe side, stay calm and qiute till you get your Contitional GC removed. If she wants to move out, then there is nothing much you can do. If is ok with her staying with you, keep qiute and stay with her. As the other persone told you, make sure your name is not on the birth certificate.
If thing dont go well, you should be able to prove to the officer that your marriage was in true intentions. And the sad part is you over stayed on B2. Its a very complicated situation. Till you get your Citizenship, you can be scrutinised with questions at your Gc interview and You citizenship interview. take some legal advise.
Good luck
 
But I don't want to be with her, just to get a permanent GC. I think that'd be suicidal, when it comes to prove, that it is a real marriage, when our kid is a mexican and was born out of an affair. The IO will probably think, that the "chick was living her own little party life, while the guy stuck around for the 10-year GC..." I'm sure she'll help me file jointly the ROC while we are separated, but I'll have to file by myself when we get a final divorce. I haven't decided which way to go...
 
I didn't mean no offense to any Mexicans, I'm just really pissed off right now. I wouldn't be happier with this situation if the kid was from a white dude, like myself. Sorry if it sounded racist of offensive.
 
Avoid the racists comments implicit or explicit, your wife cheated with a man, period. The way you present your case is important.
Under no circumstances you should stay in the marriage if you don't want to, that'll do more harm than good.
As soon as you get the divorce, you should file the I-751 with a divorce waiver.
In this forum there are plenty of cases involving I-751 and divorce, look them up.
 
JMG1010 said:
Avoid the racists comments implicit or explicit...
Click to expand...

I'm not sure why the comments are racist. driven has every right, IMHO, to disavow legal responsibility for this baby and to take whatever legal steps are necessary to ensure that the biological father--who is a Mexican citizen--lives up to his responsibilities. At that point the baby, having been born to a USC and a Mexican citizen, will be a dual US-Mexican citizen. Referring to such a child as a Mexican baby is perfectly accurate. It has nothing to do with the baby's race. It has everything to do with a perfectly valid observation regarding the baby's nationality.
 
I hope that all of the immigration officers you contact in the future are mexican americans so you can relate your story to them.

more than 50% of the border patrol agents are Americans of Mexican/hispanic origin, i dont know about the offices but when i took my biometrics i remember 2 hispanic ladies, 1 black dude and 2 white officers.

GOOD LUCK RAISING LIL JOSE !

(or maybe Lil Maria??)
 
I can't believe you made it sound like my problem is with the origin of the kid! I would've said the same thing, if it was korean, bulgarian, canadian, whatever!!! I'm not a racist, some of you guys the ones, who are reading more into my lines, than there actually is. From now on forgot I said anything. My wife got knocked up by a HUMAN and I'd like to know what my options are for ROC if I get divorced because of this.
That's all I wanted to know, I don't understand why it was a problem that I actually addressed the origin of the unborn baby. I'd understand if I'd keep saying that the f'-in "black" or "hispanic" or "asian" or whatever kid. Jesus...
 
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