To those who are desperate !!

ric2

Registered Users (C)
Dear desperate waiters,

As a previous desperate waiter, I have a lot of thoughts about this green card stuff. Let's start with the emtional change after gc.

When I first got my gc on hand, I felt nothing but a bit released and comfortable. There was absolutely no excitement since my emotion was dried up during the long long waiting game. A few days after gc, I started to feel depression since my brain then had a chance to re-visit what I had done over the previous few years. I started to question me "what the hell I have been doing",
"is this stupid green card worthy such an effort", "is immigration to this country really a good decision", "to get this stupid gc earlier, i dropped my Ph.D program. How stupid I was!", "why should i get stucked in every step of the immigration journey while so many others have much easier life", "IFFFF I had this card eariler, I would be .........!!! Why a lot of oppotunities had to be wasted!!!" .... a lot lot lot of questions.....

Quite-frankly, I could not even answer any single question and thus started to feel deep depression! Oh, boy, it was indeed not a good one and I hated it.

After a few weeks of grueling feelings, I then came to be calm. I have to use phrases which are only used in hopeless situation such as "let it be, let it be", "anyway, it is life, what you can do" ....

The only immediate benefit with this gc is that I am ABLE to go home to see my family there. In my innermost heart, I am very shameful of this fact!

So, my dear despeate waiters, you could take it easy also. As you can see, you are not necessary happier after you get green card.

For my indian folks, you guys are fortune enough to travel to your home without much worry, which is a luxury thing for your chinese counterparts. You should feel blessed in this matter.

Take it bit easier, folks. Just let life roll although some of issues are beyond of your control.

Warm holiday wishes to all my friends here!

Ric
 
ric2 well said.

I agree with you, and it is true that you will not be relived after getting GC as you will be sucked in another problem in life. And in real terms it is life.

The problem with us here is, we almost put a halt to our lives. Deep down in our heart we have a fear that what will happen. There is one major thing in your life that is +ve thinking. There are lot of people who lost every thing in their life like the Jews, the Indians and Paki’s during partition and most of them are doing good now.

The more money you have the more insecure you are, thinking that if I lose my well paying job and so on. What ever happens in life, good or bad is for favor, like ric2 is getting paid well even though he did not complete his Ph. D.

Most important is learn from your past and do what you can do now and look forward in life that good will come.
 
Welcome back RIC2 -

I remember the numerous frustrated messages you posted here - I am glad to see you understand that life does not start or end with GC - there are so many things more important.

But just try to tell that to one of the GC waiters - and its perfectly understandable why - like I said I was refering to your frustrated postings.

So it's perfect catch-22 situation.

I guess all of us will have to go through this wait and frustration phase.

Happy Holidays
 
thanks ric2

it was a very nice one from u especially when we all know ur desperation in pregc days.

It's really interesting to know from all GC holders whether life is drastically changed for them or something.

for all employment based GC seekers we r all well qualified global workers and can start from anywhere in any country. so damn this GC business, i never thought before i came here that this thing will haunt me soo bad oneday.

what could be worst that cud happen. If u think abt it, nothing will really get soo bad that we loose our peace of mind for this piece of shit.

Bottomline

" a pessimist will always find some reason to be one in the best of times, so cheer up, there is nothing gained being one"
 
Ric2,

After waiting for sooooo maaaaaaaany years, i too got my GC. Compromise..Compromise..Compromise..Thats what i did past 8 years. I have to compromise my mind from my heart. My mind said.. "You have rights... you can say NO to this.. " My heart said, "wait.. let us wait for some more time." Most of the time I feel ashamed.. i have a guilty feeling..

But GC is worth for that? Let future can answer for this.

How is your life buddy, other than GC? Did u get a chance to meet ur parents? or waiting for good-timings?

Anyway, good luck in your endeavours.

-september_gc

Originally posted by ric2
Dear desperate waiters,

As a previous desperate waiter, I have a lot of thoughts about this green card stuff. Let's start with the emtional change after gc.

When I first got my gc on hand, I felt nothing but a bit released and comfortable. There was absolutely no excitement since my emotion was dried up during the long long waiting game. A few days after gc, I started to feel depression since my brain then had a chance to re-visit what I had done over the previous few years. I started to question me "what the hell I have been doing",
"is this stupid green card worthy such an effort", "is immigration to this country really a good decision", "to get this stupid gc earlier, i dropped my Ph.D program. How stupid I was!", "why should i get stucked in every step of the immigration journey while so many others have much easier life", "IFFFF I had this card eariler, I would be .........!!! Why a lot of oppotunities had to be wasted!!!" .... a lot lot lot of questions.....

Quite-frankly, I could not even answer any single question and thus started to feel deep depression! Oh, boy, it was indeed not a good one and I hated it.

After a few weeks of grueling feelings, I then came to be calm. I have to use phrases which are only used in hopeless situation such as "let it be, let it be", "anyway, it is life, what you can do" ....

The only immediate benefit with this gc is that I am ABLE to go home to see my family there. In my innermost heart, I am very shameful of this fact!

So, my dear despeate waiters, you could take it easy also. As you can see, you are not necessary happier after you get green card.

For my indian folks, you guys are fortune enough to travel to your home without much worry, which is a luxury thing for your chinese counterparts. You should feel blessed in this matter.

Take it bit easier, folks. Just let life roll although some of issues are beyond of your control.

Warm holiday wishes to all my friends here!

Ric
 
ahhh ... we have the mature ric2 talking here

I remember the days just prior to his approval. He would whine, grunt, get into arguments with almost all the guys here.

I am sure if he were to go through the same ordeal once again ... he will do exactly the same things all over again.

its easier said than done ric2.

Anyways, enjoy your GC :)
 
Mostly people worry about NOT the delay itself but about the consequences of delay in current state of economy. IF INS takes 3 years to process I-485 but eventually approves it without any problem,then there is probably less cause for worry. But the point is nobody can assure of job stability and without similar job during I-485 process, the risk of denial or complications loom large. It's also true that these are not in our control so worrying won't solve the problem. On the other hand, little worrying or being a bit concerned can prepare one for the back up alternatives (if any exist at all) in case of adverse eventuality.

Best wishes,

Jigesh
 
The road to GC is sure a rough one. Most people (incl self) look at the GC as a 'be all, end all', something like a 'nirvana', at least that's what it eventually comes to. As the road gets longer and the wait gets tougher frustration starts setting in. When the GC finally arrives, it's as though a bubble just burst. The realization that life really hasn't changed much after all, makes one feel depressed as in the case of Ric2. So many years of waiting and sacrifices along the way just for the sake of GC makes one feel like they've wasted their best years just worrying about the GC, instead of taking things as they come and enjoying life.
 
You will feel little bit relaxed if you have GC...

...that is what most of the people here are looking for in this bad economy.
 
..

I would surely feel more secured if I get a green card........my husband is stuck in India on J1 visa and I got laid off before 180 days and so when I'll get green card then only I can go to India to visit him and then can move on with life rather than killing days because of the fucked up immigration issues. Made a huge mistake in switching from medical to computers and if I don't have a green card I would just be able to come to J1 visa(a screwed visa) and not on H1 visa if I switch my profession again....so , after green card only I can come to medical. Maaan!!!!!!!!!! my whole life is stuck because of this green card. I guess anybody in my state would be desparate if doesn't want to settle down in India.
 
Its easy to say something like this after getting GREEN CARD.
Just tell me how you felt without GC. It is very very important if you want to stay in this country legally and if you want to make progress in life (any kind of life social, economical, educational, research, businees,.........)
This is simply human nature once we get/achieve it, it has no value afterwards.
Thats way we are in IT, its human nature not to satisfy with anything.
By the way prajaram 2 in 1 where are you? :D
 
Ric, Chutya is right!

It is like Marie Antoinette saying to the protestor to eat cake if they cannot get bread!
Now I know that its not a good analogy, but I tried my utmost to relax before getting my GC, but couldn't. And compared to most of the folks posting here I have had a relatively secure, well paying and cosy job.
But after getting GC I feel a lot more relaxed and confident. I have waited much longer than you for GC and I agree that I too did not feel elated or anything, after approval, but I definitely did feel a lot relieved!
So guys waiting for GC, try to relax as much as you can! Get a massage, do something, play some sports if you are into such stuff, just try to distract yourself. It will come at the right time.
All the best.
 
ric2 and his yes man FORMER_PPHILLY you guys are nuts to put this posting

My EAD is running out soon and 485 approval is no where in near sight .If I don't get my EAD in time I might have to quit or take leave

if I had a GC on hand I wouldnot have the above problem.

If you got your GC during a better economy the first thing you would have done was look for a higher paying job. Come on who are you trying to fool.

Their are definite advantages to having a GC although I am sorry to hear that you went mental after you got it
 
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Re: ..

Originally posted by 485GCCase
I would surely feel more secured if I get a green card........my husband is stuck in India on J1 visa and I got laid off before 180 days and so when I'll get green card then only I can go to India to visit him and then can move on with life rather than killing days because of the fucked up immigration issues. Made a huge mistake in switching from medical to computers and if I don't have a green card I would just be able to come to J1 visa(a screwed visa) and not on H1 visa if I switch my profession again....so , after green card only I can come to medical. Maaan!!!!!!!!!! my whole life is stuck because of this green card. I guess anybody in my state would be desparate if doesn't want to settle down in India.

Hi,

I think you sum up all the tradeoffs that we are enduring. No matter what anybody says it is worth it because nobody would be suffering being away from family and working on shoddy terms if GC weren't worth it. Yes it won't change your life overnight because it's not like winning the x million dollars of lottery. If I had to choose 2 million dollars or GC, I would chose former without hesitation. But that's a supid analogy because I have no chance of winning lottery but at least good chance of GC if I don't get laid off. Yes, when I get GC I will also be wondering - is this piece of paper what i wasted my prime life for because with GC I won't become immortal.

So for whatever its worth, we can all just wait and hope and pray. But of course, we should also try to see how now or in future we can bring some change to this system, by petitions, organized action etc, but that's another topic.

Good luck and my advice is don't let the wait ruin your life. At least that's the one thing that you won't get back regardless of whether your GC is approved or not. Do some sports or hobby and keep a positive frame of mind when looking for job. Don't let the poison spread. I am also in same state, separated from wife and kid (17 months old) but I try to think "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger"
 
of course

GC is a million dollar worth for me. I already switched jobs after 10 months, took up a job 50 miles away from home. It is very difficult to manage my personal life with two small kids and commute. I have a good company, close to home asking me to come and join them. They know me from my previous client and want me develop the product which I developed for my previous client. This is a very interesting, development right from scratch project. Right now, because of this damn GC not in hand, I have to offer them hourly consulting on weekends. I do this 'cos I am very much interested in this project and they absolutely need me. They are telling me to choose the type of work-hours I want(whether part time/full time/ etc.,) I cannot take a decision 'cos I do not have this damn thing in my hand. I am scared to change job twice in 485 unless the current client kicks me off, which is not going to happen in the near future. A Part time job will be perfect for me with the kids. Will this dream ever come true before this chance slips away ??? God only knows !! Every night I keep thinking, why am I the unluckiest person ?? Why can't I get things done in my life w/out struggle ??:mad:
 
Look Guys!! Its eazy to look back and say what we did was good/bad/bad but we should not forget that the decision we made in past was based on facts available to us then and we must have taken the best possible option.

If you waited and were grumpy, then you must have considered all options and decided that you wanted to wait and be grumpy...

The reason we all are checking our case status daily, waiting for INS to approve our 485's is brecause we choose to and it must be the best option that we have at this point in time.
 
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