Sorry for all of out there!

Y

Yanall

Registered Users (C)
The US immigration system is not perfect. I do not blame you. Maybe they just wanna !@#$ with you. I really do not see any other explanation for this. If you love your home country so much then just go back. I have been through the process of immigration until I got a greencard. I think immigration is evidently self-inflicted. Actually the year I came to the US, I had no choice but to go to the US. My F-1 visa was obtained falsely and my asylum was just not truthful. I guess I followed the voices, because I was under too much stress. You know the US is not all flowers and roses (I know this sounds scary). I do not know, I am kinda feeling a signal now (it is probably the US) you know Europeans (rich people also from our the world) can probably enjoy the US. But then I think why would the US come to harass me. It is like if this option is not there then you do not need it. I do not know really. My heart belongs to my country. Lotfi's are not all Syrians, some are Jordanians. But me out of all those who would look just perfect to the US did not receive the signal. And then when I worked in the States, everyone was so mean about the mistakes I made and I was falling asleep (out of nowhere) and people were always pissed. And then I went to jail for some crime that has been set up for a long time. I really do not have a solution. It is you and your dollar that that makes the difference in the US. The rest of the world is just taking a crap. I had a very bad time in the US I would just walk all day (no job or anything else) and would just wait for the homeless shelters to sleep there. I went to the mental hospital many times, and the voices would just stay there. I got athlete's foot (I really don't know how) and they would just bleed and are just plain making me suffer. This very kind nurse would help me treat it. God bless her heart and then I was at "La Posada" where I gave myself 2 choices, either to continue life in the States (????) or just return home. The people at "La Posada" actually said not to stay in the US, because it is just too expensive. I was actually considering staying at this hostel but she said you do not want to spend all your money on a hostel, so I actually saw that that was fair. And I returned. I left my home country in 1996 and then I spent a year in Amman, Jordan before I went to the States. At the age of 18, you are summoned for Mandatory Military Service. Of course back then I thought the voices and visual hallucinations I have been going through were true and I applied for a student visa (F-1) with actually no source for money. Actually I got a letter from a bank when there was no money at all and no account. And I can SWEAR that the US embassy in Jordan knew that but just turned a blind eye. The visa was issued. And then later when I arrived in the US (oh I had to make myself forcefully fall in love with this older gentleman so I can have a place to stay), anyway, when I returned to my home country, I immediately sought medical help - Psychiatrist and I am on meds till this date. There is no solution really. These 2 indian guys who were in SF (also I think was carefully planned a long time ago) were liking waiting for me and just gave me total BULL!@#$, they completely recked my life. They claimed to be holy men. Anyways. They said that a guy who has also been planning to just !@#$ with me on the phone. I think the US wants to express hate to the Arabs but they do it in very malicious ways. Again this was planned. The voices asked everyday and several times a day to call Ryan R. and they asked me to say that I love him and he would just scream on the phone "I hate you". What is there to hate? Gay? White? Arab? Would you imagine that the US would do that? But then it is all about the intention. Of course I was in prison too for following the voices and committing theft and I was treated very badly in the process of getting in prison. They asked me to do very just unspeakable and they just toss me in prison. Also this US that calls itself a nation that has open borders could not have a mind that is open enough to pronounce my name that I had to change my name to an anglo-saxon name so they can be OK with the name. And then there were all the questions about my nose, I was numerously asked if I was Jewish and I kinda knew it was about my nose, even after I got a nose job, I was still perceived as a Jew, I do not know why, even with an anglo-saxon name. Of course that costs over 5,000 USD. There are all these bills that haunted me. I do not like to steal and I do not like to leave things unpaid. It is just me. My friend made me think it was OK not to pay. Of course I got bankruptcy at the last minute (before they left my credit report which was also ruined). So be careful. I know the US might sound all nice but then when the shit hits the fan, there will be no one left but yourself. I remember just staying in bed for abnormal periods of time and not doing anything not having the power to do anything. I was very skinny and very young and most of the men there would just say I am too skinny and too young. You can get a drink but it is !@#$ expensive, you can buy cigarettes but it is !@#$ expensive. Please do not think this is a solution if I am telling you my story. There is nothing nice in suffering. If you feel there is a fault in your life, just do whatever you have to do to fix it without the need for a US visa. Unless you qualify as many other visas there are to qualify for. But I bet if you have that much money in your home country you probably do not need the US. I could be wrong. Oh and then there are the drugs (illegal) that the US considers an illegal, crime. It was like with everyone I knew in the US. And they used not just once or twice but everyday, even after I left they still used it, I am pretty sure. And it is like these people who use drugs do not understand the word no for drugs. And then everyone is doing drugs. Please do not think that Iraqis and other nations the US has invaded, is in war with, are happy to be out of their countries. Most of these people suffer. Of course I can not compare my suffering with Iraqis suffering. Even Magick which is something I resorted to to solve my problems is actually a game that the US invented. Of course as a conscientious man I called DHS and told them that I lied in my asylum case but they did nothing. ???. Do they like to be lied at??? Of course the US really has to make its intentions clear and sound and just say what they feel. They do not have to set me up with this Ryan R. so they can say that they hate me. So again the US is not all flowers and roses. Housing or roommates are very hard to find. It depends. If you want to live alone or with roommates. When you do not have a job or you do, housing is just difficult maybe impossible to find. Because they plan everything before hand and for a long time. Even when the US government paid for my hotel stay after being discharged from the hospital (PAID OK???) the owners who are indian did not even want me to stay there (I felt it) even the residents there just wanted me out on the streets. So where is all this imaginary life that people think is in the US? On that day in the hotel, I paid an extra night and just left to the airpot way before I was due to board the plane and just waited there all night and morning and then in the afternoon left on the plane. It is all about $$$$. And they target people from all over the world who are just poor and poor and mentally ill. It is no better in Syria if it wasn't for my dad whom I dearly love, the voices would just drive out to the streets. Sorry for this very lengthy article, but this is a tiny bit of what happened to me.
 
Did you forget to take your meds?

If you did not like the way you were treated, you have the choice of leaving or staying and suffer! You chose the latter! Is it the U.S.'s fault or yours?
 
I am actually haunted by the US, I do not haunt immigration. And to your question about staying and suffering. I actually heard that before. It was no longer my choice, I was given instructions to go back. First it happened in 2003 when I heard a voice that told me to go home, of course I did not like that, but when you have voices that haunt your mind, whatever you do does not matter, if the voices say it, it will be done. of course I fought the voice that said to go home and I ended up endlessly in mental hospitals and then at La Posada where I could not stay forever and I consulted the people who worked there and it sounded better to go home (money wise) because the US is just very expensive. I had other unpaid debt that I actually dealt with later but then I got more unpaid debt. So really I do not know who to blame, I actually resort always to blame myself about whatever goes on in my life. But that is a very good question. Is it the US fault? I do not want to point fingers. I actually came to the point to apply for US citizenship but how would I be able to arrange that? It is very difficult when you hear voices and see visual hallucinations, you feel like you are not yourself. The nurses at the hospital at California Pacific care were very nice to take care of my feet that were in disgusting form. So I do not know whose fault it is. that's another tiny bit of what happened to me. But who cares? LOL. Again Syrian police is no better. I think the root of this whole problem is in Syria or???? I do not even know. I am mentally ill so why ask me?
 
"My F-1 visa was obtained falsely and my asylum was just not truthful."

People like you are cause of delays in truthful asylum claims taking forever to get approved, or people being rejected or otherwise referred to immigration court. U don't know the worth of what u have..people are praying everyday to get approval for their genuine asylum cases, and u came on the forum proudly posting of getting approval on a fraudulent claim. I don't think US is for people like you, pack your bags and leave, no one is holding u back and stop haunting this peaceful forum. Like meshabul said go take your Meds.
 
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