Well, we agree there. It is an oxymoron, fast - government.
I do have grounds, I think, but as has been stated, if the requirements are a US Visa (in the passport) and being legally married. She does meet those requirements. We are legally separated, divorce has been filed, I thought that legally separated was enough. Maybe not. As a TD holder, she is not permitted to work, if she decides to work anyway and is caught, I don't want it to reflect on me as we no longer make decisions together. If she commits a crime, I do not want that to reflect on me.
I am pursuing a path to Green Card and citizenship, and I generally try to inform myself of the laws, requirements, benefits and consequences, but in this case I cannot find any literature that addresses this specific situation. A TN and TD that have split up. As government agencies love to create very large documents, I reached out to see if anyone else knew where I should look specifically for information that would help me understand.