Well, I understand your situation itspec, but I must say that your immigrant visa application is dead. There is no way can your parent as a u.s. pernament residence petition for a married child. You void it when you get married. Even if the USCIS approves it, that does'nt matter. The Visa Center is gonna terminate it cause the have you as umarried and the petitioner as a pernament residence. Even if you bypass that, then the real nightmare begins, the consulate gonna deny your visa and you will not get your money back.
The only way out is to deny that you are not married, and you will be verrrrrrrrrrrrrrry crazzzzzzzzzzy to do that. I cant understand why you did'nt weigh this before you get married after you waited for ten years. As long as the love is there a few extra months would' kill. You could have waited unti your mom becomes a citizens then you get married, she then upgrade the petition to F1 you get a instant processing, then you go and come back to get married and petition for your wife. And even the a better way, your mom becomes a USC, downgrade the petition and you still get instant processing along with your wife and kids if any under f3....cause that category past your priority date.