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Negative reaction from friends, co workers or family..

Mijoro

Mijoro

Well-Known Member
Has anyone else experienced a lot of negativity from people around them when they find out you were selected for further processing. I have had comments from "it's a scam" to "why would you want to go there?" to
"You'll never find a job". Honestly I don't know if my CN will be allocated an interview but I am just surprised at how negative some people can be when they hear of your good news. Does anyone else have similar experiences with unexpected comments?

I guess misery does love company, but they ain't getting mine.

 
Not here, but I guess the situation is different because I already live in USA. Those who don't have PR yet are interested in getting one and would ask questions on how to do it. Friends and relatives who are citizens offer nothing but congratulations.
 
Yeah my experience is similar to Hexa - but a lot of people are negative toward America, and some are just plain negative. However, to try and explain that you believe you will have a better life and more opportunity there can come across insulting to them or their country - which they may love. Every persona has a different position so you could just simply explain that you are going to pursue the opportunity and see where it leads you - and then ask why would someone want to limit their options? Real friends and family will understand and accept your decision, that is all that matters.
 
My actual friends who know how much I want this are as happy as I am, same with family. It's mostly just co workers and I explained to them that it's time for me to have an adventure. I think there will always be people like you said Simon that will rain on your parade, lucky for me I like to carry an umbrella :D
 
People around me all happy and they wish me the best. They also gave me long lists of things to buy for them when I visit home again in the future :D
 
rafi-cairo said:
People around me all happy and they wish me the best. They also gave me long lists of things to buy for them when I visit home again in the future :D
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I assume they will send some money with you to procure these things? ;)
 
mijoro said:
Has anyone else experienced a lot of negativity from people around them when they find out you were selected for further processing. I have had comments from "it's a scam" to "why would you want to go there?" to
"You'll never find a job". Honestly I don't know if my CN will be allocated an interview but I am just surprised at how negative some people can be when they hear of your good news. Does anyone else have similar experiences with unexpected comments?

I guess misery does love company, but they ain't getting mine.

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I keep it a secret if my cn becomes current I will inform people when I am on the way to the airport lol
 
I get a bit of negativity even mentioning that I am TRYING to win! Some friends roll their eyes and call me a dreamer, others judge me for leaving family (my children are grown). There are still others that think it is an exciting prospect but they are usually fellow classmates at university. I think my family are ok with the prospect of it maybe happening one day (DV or other visa) but don't like to talk about it because they don't really want us to leave. Each year as the lottery opens, they make comments like "so, that lottery thing again huh?".

At the end of the day, everyone has reasons for making judgements about your choices in life, but it is very rarely about you, and more about their needs :)

Good luck to all the selectees - how awesome. Fingers crossed for our selection this time around, otherwise we will move on to our plan b when the time comes.

Q
 
Eucn said:
I keep it a secret if my cn becomes current I will inform people when I am on the way to the airport lol
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I was the same, but I kept it in for so long I thought I was going to burst....LOL Now I will drop it and I am pretty sure everyone will go about their business and forget about it. The next time they hear about it will be when I email them from my new american home.
 
mijoro said:
I was the same, but I kept it in for so long I thought I was going to burst....LOL Now I will drop it and I am pretty sure everyone will go about their business and forget about it. The next time they hear about it will be when I email them from my new american home.
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Better yet. Send a post card
 
I am not saying I care about what other people think, I said I was surprised by some peoples negative reactions.
 
I actually have few reasons to not talk about the GC. Nothing upsetting but simply makes the life easier :) So here it is:

- graduated in the home country and straight after uni started working in the UK, years passed and me and my wife found home here, have great friends, family (my wife's uncle is English), house, good jobs and all that stuff, spoke to one of my mates about possibility of moving to the US and he asked "what is wrong with my country you ungrateful bastard" as a joke of course but I kinda know what he was talking about, even before I become citizen everyone has treated me with respect and never let me know that I'm just an immigrant (unlike in the US where when I was working on L1 I met quite few narrow minded people, mostly from the south who did not have anything good to say about immigrants especially from AF and AS) and I simply don't want to hurt their feelings and being considered ungrateful :)
- friends/colleagues from the homeland consider US a country of fat, stupid people only interested in guns, wars and money so they won't get excited about it anyway :)
- will let know my family after/if ever I get the GC and I can move to the US, now they live only 2 hours flight from us and they complain and miss us like crazy...don't even want to see their faces when they find out that we want to move on the other side of the pond

So that is pretty much all of it.
 
franko said:
I actually have few reasons to not talk about the GC. Nothing upsetting but simply makes the life easier :) So here it is:

- graduated in the home country and straight after uni started working in the UK, years passed and me and my wife found home here, have great friends, family (my wife's uncle is English), house, good jobs and all that stuff, spoke to one of my mates about possibility of moving to the US and he asked "what is wrong with my country you ungrateful bastard" as a joke of course but I kinda know what he was talking about, even before I become citizen everyone has treated me with respect and never let me know that I'm just an immigrant (unlike in the US where when I was working on L1 I met quite few narrow minded people, mostly from the south who did not have anything good to say about immigrants especially from AF and AS) and I simply don't want to hurt their feelings and being considered ungrateful :)
- friends/colleagues from the homeland consider US a country of fat, stupid people only interested in guns, wars and money so they won't get excited about it anyway :)
- will let know my family after/if ever I get the GC and I can move to the US, now they live only 2 hours flight from us and they complain and miss us like crazy...don't even want to see their faces when they find out that we want to move on the other side of the pond

So that is pretty much all of it.
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Hmmm Franko, I am fat and British. SO - what is wrong with my country you ungrateful barsteward, and who are you calling fat????
 
Yes, we've experienced similar attitudes about our move to the US. We moved from Australia back to Canada in 2012, then found out we'd been selected for DV2013. And here we are in the US now. All our friends & family were enthused and excited about our move back to Canada, with people gushing about Canada being so wonderful & perfect. No such enthusiasm or gushing about our move to the US, except from a very small minority. We've had some snide remarks about rednecks and guns and other rubbish stereotypes. Since we're in Florida, we're assumed to eat dinner at 4pm and travel around in a golf cart. And apparently, I'll be dyeing my hair blue-grey one day. :rolleyes: I often get the feeling that those people who say those things don't mean them to be a joke either.

There's a lot of anti-Americanism throughout the world. I'm not saying everyone has to love the US, or any country, but the stereotypes and pure bigotry displayed towards Americans is mean and dumb. It's viewed as fashionable and progressive, superior thinking to disparage and sneer at Americans and the US. So some of the negative attitudes towards DV winners is due to that anti-Americanism. Others are probably just feeling envy.
 
Vichel said:
There's a lot of anti-Americanism throughout the world. I'm not saying everyone has to love the US, or any country, but the stereotypes and pure bigotry displayed towards Americans is mean and dumb. It's viewed as fashionable and progressive, superior thinking to disparage and sneer at Americans and the US. So some of the negative attitudes towards DV winners is due to that anti-Americanism. Others are probably just feeling envy.
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+1
 
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