GCME,
Don't even try to explain INS actions.They usualy don't make sence
We have filed together with my wife.We were married way before the green card process started.I got my I-485 aproved on Feb,28 2005 and her's still pending.(I-485 ND dec 5,2002 both )
I asked the IO about my wife's case when I went to stamp my passport.
She said that every case is diferent..blah...blah.
Just hang in there and try to keep your mind of this assholes.
We are all dealing with underpaid,overworked,lazy goverment employees and we can't do anything about it!