Does anyone know good relaxation technique?

jlalwani

Shower does help relieve stress.

Shower and a meditation music is good combination....I have tried it...

Also reading ...especially Humor ....

It helps ...

Just my $0.02 ..
 
GreenPatta: Thanks for missing me, didn't think anyone cared.

More on depression - a year and 1/2 ago I was at the point of throwing myself out of my window and somehow ended up getting 2 cats instead. Don't mean to harp on the importance of pets but try going to a pet store and playing with some of the creatures there. Its very difficult to see any hope when you're down and out and wondering what the next punch would be. I have found that alcohol, exercise, any attempts at distraction actually makes it worse. You feel like slapping people who give you trivial advice like "go out and have fun". Its actually OK to feel bad for a while. Don't let them guilt you into thinking your feelings are so abnormal that its a disease.
 
perspective

I would like to share some of my experience on this.

I had to go thru very difficult time in my life which I would have never imagined would have to go thru , few years ago. I lost my child just before my due date. I never thought would happen to me. I couldn't even cry for a week. Most shocking experience. I tried everything to keep my mind off. I became workaholic , tried all sorts of diversion principles. I took swimming classes, painting , skiing etc etc... But the sadness always stayed with me. Specially when I drove for 45 minutes to work, I cried every day in my car. I went to get some therapy help. Did not help! To a therapist, she was only facinated by the beautiful story I was giving. She couldn't say anything because of my cultural difference. I gave up finally. I started vsiting Gym everyday. My depressed state brought up every little details of my life , my in-laws mistreatement made me angry, my failures in life made me feel very low about myself, child abuses that I had go thru, my self esteem was too low. I read Vedas, Bible and even quaran. All these religious matters made me more confused and made me think like hell was sure for me. It scared me because I thought I was already living in it.

Anyway Did everything change? Yes indeed! I am happy today, as I was 10 years ago 89% of the times. I am depressed remaining times. What changed me? My and only my perspective about life. I changed all my negative thoughts into positive one. I would get up in the morning, promise myself that I will think positive about everything that day. Ofcource, losing my child is never positive. But I learnt to learn about myself and my emotions. What angered me , what upset me, what depresses me, what makes me anxius. I became to read my emotions as a book. And learn to tackle them. I became emotionally intelligent. For eg., I used think my mother-in-law as very cruel woman. I started keeping myself in her position , in her environment with her little interaction with the outside world. I would probably reacted in the same way. Everything made sense. Life indeed is more positive. It is only our perspective that we need to change. It is not what happens to us that hurts us. It is our reaction to what happens that hurts us. Sorry for the long one. But it is true..
 
gcwait0902

Really sad story. Thanks for sharing with us....since there is lot to learn from ..

God bless you ..
 
Thanks gcwait0902 and Anita Gupta

for sharing something which not everyone is able to do selflessly. I really respect your views. Its making me realize that I am not the only one who had to go thru such phases of life.
 
485GCcase

Please try to read 'Art of happiness" by Dhalai Lama.

It is a very good one. It is not religiostic or anything. Just for anyone.
 
gcwait0902

I did flip through a few pages while I was reading books on Tibetan Buddhism.

485GCCase, that book is available at B&N.....and you will get it for less.

Once a powerful king asked Buddha why do you think that you are a happy soul? What do you have? Look at me. I am rich and powerful. I am more happy than you.

Buddha said, "King, can you spend a few moments not thinking of anything? You have so much to worry about......how can you say you are happy? ..Look at me...I can spends hours and days "not thinking" of anything. I can easily reach a thoughtlessness and find myself content...
 
I think sex is very good medicine for relieving stress and boredome in life. But in order to do that , you need very good partner. Personality and physicals.

In general you see how American people have smile on their face most of the time, one of the main reason is their Sex life is good. I mean look at the some of the womens , they are very attractive, assertive, active and strong.

What do you think ???
 
indiatoday I agree with you

You are well said. If we get a very good parner (understanding and doing very good sex) our stress will be gone.
Most of our .....No i stopped my writing.
 
the_matrix

I had read that book couple of times now. My opinion on meditation and thoughlessness is ,they are not for stressful souls like us who is so immersed in everyday duties,desires and aspirations. It is for yogis who wants to lead an isolated life. We are all trying to strive in a social life with lots of emotions. I remmeber doing meditation during my college days just to focus on my studies. Because I wanted good grades and be able to achieve my goal which is very much a worldly one. Am I happy just because I could achieve all these? No. I want more. But if the cause of meditation is to achieve a more sacred goal of enlightment, as Budha says, then that is different. I don't think we have that kind of luxury. We need family, friends social life, desires and aspirations. Our goal is to manage all these in an more peaceful manner. Meditation did not personally help me. The more I meditated , I became more focused on my personal problems.

What particulary impressed me in this book was , with so many political problems, how the exile religious leader finds peace and happiness. He even says if he had lived in Tibet without the occupation, he would have never learned about the outside world. So he finds some positive meaning even in Chi occupation of Tibet, while fighting against it peacefully. It just amazes me! I particulary learnt about triggering my positive feelings in life from that book. Again I was determined to come out my depressed state, so it made sense to me.

He has something to say about happiness derived from sex too. He says, you might achieve a temporary relief out of sex, but it is not a permanant one.

About anger, he says you learn to control it. I have heard people say, if you act on your anger, you would be relieved. But that is not true. You learn to control it. Don't act on it. Learn to fight it. If you continue that, it would eventually become your habit and behavior. Angry person can become a peaceful person.

I find it intruding. It is amazing how a body gets adapted to everything. For eg, you visit gym and do tread mill for 20 minutes , you breath faster. But do it for a week, it is a piece of cake. Same adaptation applies to everything, stress in life, adiction, even sex life...
 
My relaxation technique

Well.....

You guys might laugh ( and girls might get mad) but I am serious

If I watch NFL on my couch for the entire Sunday eating chinese food and a beer - I feel really relaxed when I go back to work on Monday.

I am positive none of you guys use this technique
 
Re: My relaxation technique

Originally posted by abhi_01201


I am positive none of you guys use this technique
Click to expand...

Thank G for that! I am sure your six-pack has a lot of bubble wrap around it :D
 
This adaptation is something whole world is talking about and dealing with. It doesn't come easily to many. But even I feel I am understanding my emotions more clearly now after so much of struggle. so well, it taught me that. Regarding sex........well its good for overall well being.........but it doesn't give long time relief from problems, well can't say much till I experience it :eek:
 
gcwait0902, I am most impressed by your response and your strength to share your story. Thanks for sharing. I agree, when we get distressed, it is usually not because of what happened but because we thought what happened was the worst thing that could happen.

I also liked (i think alka's) the suggestion about going to hospital. Basically the idea is to see people with a lot more problems and feeling better that you are really not in the worst situation. It basically ties into the previous point of changing your perspective.

I have heard a lot about yoga and meditation and I am sure it works for many people, but I have not tried so cannot say much.

I believe pleasure is the opposite of stress. So the equation is simple. Do something that gives you pleasure. It will cut stress like acid cuts grease. The trick is to find a continuous stream of pleasure. "Go out and have fun" kind of activities are indeed good stress releivers but unfortunately they are temporary and serve at most as distraction and not cure. In that respect, I do agree an exciting, trusting, intimate relationship (not just sex) can cut down stress because you can draw from it.

My suggestion will be to try public service. Helping sick people in hospital, helping homeless kids, disabled people, or simply volunteer work for school or other social organization. Not by writing checks or sending food. But go there and spend time and help people in person. The idea is to help people because you can. Because you have the strength. I can do it because I have the capability and the other person does not. However bad it may sound but it serves a selfish purpose. It makes you feel better about yourself. It makes you feel you achieved something. And then after a while you start drawing pleasure out of helping others. Guess what, it works.

My $0.1999...

by the way, anita, pets may have worked for you. and i can see why. i love dogs as watching them play is a lot of fun. but when i think of cleaning their 'surprises', i really get stressed out. :)

i would like to reduce some stress by going to a friends place and playing with their dogs :)
 
I think prayer in the morning helps. However scientific we may have become there are times when we feel a need to turn to a higher power for guidance and solace. Just trust wholeheartedly in God and you will always feel safe. To quote Gandhi he said that in time of trouble he remembered the Gita and "immediately a smile always came to my lips".

Another way I comfort myself is to think of how fortunate I am compared to so many others. Think of the poor innocent children in Afghanistan or Palestine; My problem of waiting for a green card is minor compared to children losing their limbs in a landmine or having no schools. I do have a future.
 
Moving stories...

Yes, this forum is great. Good people, being honest with each other.
You will keep coming back when your green card you receive.

I have had depression / anxiety / panic attacks for the past
two years. All of you have made some great points, tips etc.

I agree with GC, that ultimately it's how we choose to react
to life's turbulence that is key. I am recovering now,
but in order for me to get here, there were things I tried,
things I foolishly avoided, medicines (self administered and clinical),
and things I had to experience.

The realisation GC and I have come to, though sounding
simple, took a while for us to arrive at. Friends, therapists,
medicines etc. can all help, but ultimately it's you who must
make the journey on your own.

This site is amazing. Hindu, Muslim, Christian - all
sharing, sometimes squabbling, but just getting along,
in the words of Rodney King.

PS. I am glad to see so many desi NFL fans! ;-)
Go Falcons this Sunday.
 
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