I have been contemplating divorcing my immigrant spouse for some time. I am so tired and emotionally exhausted from the relationship. We both just filed the adjustment of status form to remove conditions. My question is this. He seems to only care that I want a divorce because it is inconvenient for him right now. He does not yet have the 10 year gc in his hands. So I am feeling pressured to stay with him until he does. I feel like that is not right. I am worried about my physical and emotional health staying in this relationship any longer. I also worry that once he has the 10 yr gc he wont think twice about a divorce, which only adds to my feelings of being used. What are the chances of him being deported if I were to file divorce now? How true is this fear or his?
Divorce after filing I-175
- Thread starter Jessica1
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ananga73
Registered Users (C)
Your statement is quite contradictory. You say you are contemplating divorce, and are worried by your physical and emotional health however your statement I also worry that once he has the 10 yr gc he wont think twice about a divorce, which only adds to my feelings of being used seems also to imply that either you really do not want the divorce or you only want it on your terms.
It is a very realistic fear. If your divorce goes through before the conditions are removed, he can be deported when USCIS later finds out. It probably will come up when he tries to go for citizenship down the line
It is a very realistic fear. If your divorce goes through before the conditions are removed, he can be deported when USCIS later finds out. It probably will come up when he tries to go for citizenship down the line
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IF you are being used just for a greencard, get out BEFORE he gets a 10 yr greencard or else you are stuck financially via the I-864.
YOU don't get out of the I-864 until he gets naturalized, deported, works full-time on the books for 10 years cumulatively (40 quarters paying into social security), abandons the U.S. and moves away, or dies.
I guess it is difficult because it is only a decision that I can make. I don't know for sure but I have a strong sense he is not being honest. Also, he has just not been a very good husband in general. I am afraid that I will find out too late, realize I have been used, and then be stuck with a big bill for years. Also, I don't feel like I hate him enough to send him back to a country he hates and was abused in...so you see my dilemma. Ive been praying about this for a long time. Its not like I can even separate to get away from him for a while. Its very difficult.
btw, we have both been going to our own counsellors. He has severe ADHD and I also have depression, a bad combination, the fighting is non stop. I do care for him, but I have doubts all the time about his sincerity, im really afraid he is just using me, but like I said I dont know for sure. Im just tired of being miserable.
ananga73
Registered Users (C)
Let me tell you something, the grass always appears greener from the other side. The statistics on 2nd marriages is not good at all. Divorce should be a last option. We do not know the details of your story, your counselor will be best able to glean some of his innermost thoughts. You should have some joint counseling sessions. If the marriage is at all salvageable, give it your best shot.
how to do it?