time to return home

V

vermier

New Member
I will 50 this year. I started my green card journey in 2001 and after so many years it is still in "process". I used information on this website and wrote all available senators, even to First Lady: Laura Bush. Nothing worked- seems like name check needs more than 3 years to process my case.
When I left home 11 years ago - for some reasons I did not sell my house and it came 20 times in value which will give some financial support for my return. I felt many times so miserable against this bureaucratic system-especially when my brother was killed in accident back in home and I even couldn't able to go there because of immigration process - he was only 37.
My son next year will be ready for college - very bright kid, but all USA colleges
will be closed for him and we need to move on. I gave deadline for myself - my birthday, if it will not happen by that time - I will start a rollback process.
Someone maybe thinking that I am upset - actually it is not true. Living In USA I got a lot, I had nice and secure life, good jobs,got great skill set, fantastic friends and I really grateful USA for that. Already started looking for job back in home, got some very interesting offers, so many people impressed with my resume there. I incline to think maybe it is GOD will to happen this way and I just have to accept it. I had so many hardships in my life and this one will be just one of them. Logistics are complicated I have to admit: sell a house, load all our stuff to be moved and start new life again. My friends back in home already promised to help me.
Just for information:
RIR- December 2001
I-485 - September 2004
EB3,(worldwide)
Thank you.
 
I hear you. Life is short. Economy is global and if you have skills/health and are willing to work you will be able to live anywhere you like. There are lots of surprises for all of us in life and thats what makes living worthwhile. Do what your gut tells you and all the best.
 
UK has a system - that says you are PR if you had lived for x amount of years. Here its crap... For the amount of time, we had spent here, we could have gottten the PR in UK... but GOD has better plans fo rus.......My friend who was layed off in July 2001 from one of the offices at WTC, NY realised GOD had a purpose for him to keep him ALIVE. he thought he lost of job, GC, all hopes... but after 9/11 he realised that he would have been dead , if he still had the job.


Its better to have a life, security, peace of mind , relatives and friends....than a piece of Plastic card. After all we have the perception that GC will give us some security.... but seen my friends with GC...... they are more worried than me ... worrying about the future (30 years ahead)
 
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You have taken the first and most important step towards having peace of mind in this process, which is to decide that you really don't need the green card. When you need something that is out of your control, and you are not getting it, it really disturbs your brain.

The ironic thing about it is that sometimes when you decide that you don't need something, that is when you end up getting it. Last month I started a thread about being fed up and preparing to leave, and then within a few days I got the "card production ordered" email!

Even if you go back, please don't give up on your son's dream of going to a US college if that is what he still wants to do. With a good academic record built in a US high school, combined with good SAT/ACT scores, he should be able to get enough scholarships and grants to be able to come back with an F-1 without too much expense on you.
 
Very Sad to hear about your story, lot of people are in similar situation
please stay for 1 more year, you stayed 11 years, why dont you postpone to 1 more year by the time you may get your GC and then you ca ndecide to go or not

As an Indian,if i start thinking to go back India, we also have lof of good offers there but we gave a decade life to this country and in return it gave me retrogression and namecheck pending stage
sometime i do feel going back to India, but you never know What GOD has plan for us here

All the best
 
I hear ya

I've been thinking on those lines in the past few days, but have not set up a deadline for myself as yet.

All the best in whatever you end up doing!

vermier said:
I will 50 this year. I started my green card journey in 2001 and after so many years it is still in "process". I used information on this website and wrote all available senators, even to First Lady: Laura Bush. Nothing worked- seems like name check needs more than 3 years to process my case.
When I left home 11 years ago - for some reasons I did not sell my house and it came 20 times in value which will give some financial support for my return. I felt many times so miserable against this bureaucratic system-especially when my brother was killed in accident back in home and I even couldn't able to go there because of immigration process - he was only 37.
My son next year will be ready for college - very bright kid, but all USA colleges
will be closed for him and we need to move on. I gave deadline for myself - my birthday, if it will not happen by that time - I will start a rollback process.
Someone maybe thinking that I am upset - actually it is not true. Living In USA I got a lot, I had nice and secure life, good jobs,got great skill set, fantastic friends and I really grateful USA for that. Already started looking for job back in home, got some very interesting offers, so many people impressed with my resume there. I incline to think maybe it is GOD will to happen this way and I just have to accept it. I had so many hardships in my life and this one will be just one of them. Logistics are complicated I have to admit: sell a house, load all our stuff to be moved and start new life again. My friends back in home already promised to help me.
Just for information:
RIR- December 2001
I-485 - September 2004
EB3,(worldwide)
Thank you.
Click to expand...
 
to do or not to do..

vermier,

i like your story... the most important thing in life is peace, then happiness... what good is a good living standard, if our mind is not at peace..


Iam sure many of us here can relate to your story... it took me 5 1/2 years to get my card... more than being happy getting card, i felt some frustration and still do..all these years.. cannot change jobs, cannot get home loans from any lender, cannot travel without Advance Parole ... above all, i cannot bring my mom here to live with me..even now. i lost my dad a little over an year ago... my 65 yr old mom feels increasingly lonely.. i feel increasingly guilty... she can only come as a visitor for 6 months and cannot stay longer in US than in my home country overall... i am being torn between staying here and leaving ... i know i am going to leave... i am giving myself sometime... all in all, my GC came a little too late ... maybe its for my own good... now, i can remain a citizen of my motherland, go back and take care of my mother and motherland... for all the success they gave me in my life!
 
1victim said:
vermier,

i like your story... the most important thing in life is peace, then happiness... what good is a good living standard, if our mind is not at peace..


Iam sure many of us here can relate to your story... it took me 5 1/2 years to get my card... more than being happy getting card, i felt some frustration and still do..all these years.. cannot change jobs, cannot get home loans from any lender, cannot travel without Advance Parole ... above all, i cannot bring my mom here to live with me..even now. i lost my dad a little over an year ago... my 65 yr old mom feels increasingly lonely.. i feel increasingly guilty... she can only come as a visitor for 6 months and cannot stay longer in US than in my home country overall... i am being torn between staying here and leaving ... i know i am going to leave... i am giving myself sometime... all in all, my GC came a little too late ... maybe its for my own good... now, i can remain a citizen of my motherland, go back and take care of my mother and motherland... for all the success they gave me in my life!
Click to expand...


:( OMG how sad....
 
I'm fast beginning to come to the same conclusion. My father had his 60th birthday last year as did my mother. My father's health isn't as good as it used to be and when I spoke to him on his birthday, I could hear the sadness in his voice that we weren't together as a family.

I feel guilty for being here but am slowly realising that my family are more important. I have finally come out of denial and understand that there is NO WAY that I can have my parents with me in the US.

In the future if I am blessed with children I would want my parents to be an integral part of their life.

With that said, I have decided to take a short holiday and when I'm back will begin to understand are there any other countries I can go to, that will allow my parents to join me in a few years, maybe Austrailia or Canada. Or I will make the decision and return to the UK.
 
It is a painful process, but, once you get the plastic card, you will feel something different. I still have more journeys to go, but at least things are moving along, which is a big relief for all of us. The bureaucracy in this free country implies and makes a lot of odd things ….. :(
 
1 Victim - I feel for you . I can imagine what you must be going through. I cant advise you anything as I know you know what do do . But do what ever you have to take care of your mother ......My best wishes for you ......
 
rav_oranges said:
With that said, I have decided to take a short holiday and when I'm back will begin to understand are there any other countries I can go to, that will allow my parents to join me in a few years, maybe Austrailia or Canada. Or I will make the decision and return to the UK.
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Actually I am surprised that you would bother to leave England to put up with this US immigration crap. Maybe you didn't realize what you were getting into until you were already deep into it.

However, while most other developed countries are much more welcoming and efficient when it comes to skills-based immigration, they don't offer much in the way of family-based immigration other than spouse and children. You'll have to look hard to find a country that will allow you to bring your parents. The US will allow you to bring your parents, but only after you've become a citizen which takes 5 years after getting the green card (unless you meet the criteria for faster citizenship, like being married to a US citizen or serving in the US military).
 
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Jackolantern said:
Actually I am surprised that you would bother to leave England to put up with this US immigration crap. Maybe you didn't realize what you were getting into until you were already deep into it.

However, while most other developed countries are much more welcoming and efficient when it comes to skills-based immigration, they don't offer much in the way of family-based immigration other than spouse and children. You'll have to look hard to find a country that will allow you to bring your parents. The US will allow you to bring your parents, but only after you've become a citizen which takes 5 years after getting the green card (unless you meet the criteria for faster citizenship, like being married to a US citizen or serving in the US military).
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To be honest, I think it was a combination of I didn't know what I wanted and I didn't realise the mess the green card process was.

I'll definitely be looking into the job situation in both the UK and Canada. I 'believe' Canada is slightly easier on family based immigration but will this time talk to an experienced independent attorney before moving to any country apart from the UK. I'll also look into Austraila too.

To be honest I would like to be out of the UK as I feel it's too crowded for me but the big thing is that all my family is there and all are UK citizens.

Thankfully I'm already married to a wonderful Indian girl, who calms me down and understands my stresses.
 
Find out what you can about Canada and Australia. However, as bad as it is, I think you will find that the US actually has the most generous family-based immigration policies of all OECD countries.

At least with your UK citizenship, you have other options like Ireland and the rest of the EU where you can go without any immigration paperwork.
 
Wow i am surprised how anyone can think of trying other option's after having undergone the GC process here? Doing it once after leaving your country is enough.To try to start a new life each time all over again ,its mind blowing. How do you guys do it? Everybody knows its not easy as reading out the attractive brochures of life as a immigrant to UK, Australia or Canada.


Regards.
 
rav_oranges said:
Thankfully I'm already married to a wonderful Indian girl, who calms me down and understands my stresses.
Click to expand...

Now that, my man, is a great decision!! :) You don't have to say "Wonderful Indian"..its redundant!
Indian wives are pretty good when it comes to decision making and keeping cool!!
 
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