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sam99

Registered Users (C)
Guys Happy Fri to all...Hope you all will enjoy this story below..

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Year : 2100
Place : Two Americans at IBM, USA.
Currency Conversion Rate: Rs. 1/- = US $100/-.

Alex : Hi John, you didn't come yesterday to office?

John : Yeah, I was in Indian Embassy for stamping.

Alex: Oh really, what happened, I heard that nowadays it has become very strict.

John : Yeah, but I managed to get it.

Alex : How long it took to get it stamped?

John : Oh, it was nasty man, long queue. Bill Gates was standing in front of me and they played with him like anything. Thats why it got delayed. I went there at 2 am itself and waited and returned by 4 pm.

Alex : Really? In India, it is a matter of an hour to get stamped for USA.

John : Yeah, but that is because who in India will be interested
in coming to USA man, their economy has been booming.

Alex : So, when are you leaving?

John : Anytime, after receiving my tickets from the client in India
and you know, I will be getting a chance to fly Air-India. Sort of dream come true.

Alex : How long are you going to stay in India?

John : What do you mean by how long? I will be settled in India,
my company has promised me that they will process my Hara Patta.

Alex : Really, lucky person man, it is very difficult to get a Hara Patta in India.

John : Yeah, thats why, I am planning to marry an Indian girl there.

Alex : But you can find lots of US girls in Hyderabad,Bangalore and Mumbai.

John : But, I prefer Indian girls because they are beautiful and cultured.

Alex : Where did you get the offer, Hyderabad?
John : Yeah, salary is good there, but cost of living is quite
High, it is Rs. 1000/- for a single room accommodation.

Alex : I see, that's too much for US people, Rs. 1/- = $ 100/-.
Oh God! What about in Chennai, Mumbai?

John : No idea, but it is less than what we have in Hyderabad.
It is like the world headquarters of Software.

Alex : I heard, almost all the Indians are having one personal
Robot for help.

John : You can get a BMW car for Rs. 5000/-, and a personal
Robot for less than Rs. 7500/-. But my dream is to purchase
Ambassador, which costs Rs.200000

Alex : By the way, who is your client?

John : Reddy and Naidu Associates, a pure Indian company,
specializing in Embedded Software.

Alex : Oh, really, lucky to work in a pure Indian company. They are really intelligent and unlike American Bodyshoppers who have opened their Fly-by-night outfits in India. Indian companies pay you in full even when you are on bench. My friend Paul Allen, it seems, used his bench time to visit Bihar,the most livable place in India, probably world.There you have full freedom and no restrictions. You can do whatever you want! I wonder how that state has perfected that system.

John : Yeah man, you are right. I hope our America also follows their footsteps.

Alex : How are you going to cope with their language?

John : Why not? From my school days I have been learning Telugu as my first language here at New York.At the Consulate they tested my proficiency in Telugu and were quite impressed by my t percent score in TOTIL i.e.Test of Telugu as Indian Language.

Alex : So, you are going to have fun there.

John : Yeah, I will be travelling in the world's fastest train, world's largest theme park, and the famous Bollywood where you can see actors like, Hrithik, and all. Esselworld is also near to Bollywood.

Alex : You know, the PM is scheduled to visit US next year, he may then relax the number of visas.

John : That's true. Last month, Narayanamurthy visited White House and donated Rs. 2000/- for infrastructure development at Silicon Valley and has promised more if we follow the model of High-Tech City of Hyderabad.Bill Gates also got a chance of meeting him. Very lucky person.

Alex : But, Indian government is planning to split Narayanamurthy's Infosys.

John : He is a hard worker man, he can build any number of Infosys like this. Every minute he is getting Rs. 1000/-. It seems, if you keep all his money converted as Rs. 100/- notes you can reach Pluto.

Alex : OK, Good Luck John.

John : Same to you Alex. And don't go to Consulate in a Kurta Pyjama because they will think you are too Indianised and may doubt you will ever come back and hence your Non-Immigrant Visa may get rejected. But don't forget to say "Namaste, aap kaise hai" to the Visa officer at Window . It seems he likes that and will not give you a visa if you don't greet him that way.


:D :D :D
 
That's fun. But it should've been TOTFL Test of Telugu as Foreign Language (Not TOTIL i.e.Test of Telugu as Indian Language). Because for these people, 'Telugu' is a Foreign Language.
 
So is Hrithik

A popular bar had a new robotic bartender installed. A guy came in for a
drink and the robot asked him, "What's your IQ"?
The man replied, "130".
So the robot proceeded to make conversation about physics, astronomy,
investments, insurance, and so on.
The man listened intently and thought, "This is really cool".
Another guy came in for a drink and the robot asked him, "What's your
IQ?"
The man responded, "100."
So the robot started talking about the football, baseball and so on.
The man thought to himself, "Wow, this is really cool".
A third guy came in to the bar. As with the others, the robot asked him,
"What's your IQ?"
The man replied, "70".
The robot then said, "So, what's the Democratic Party up to these days?
 
Ostrich

A man walks into a restaurant with an full-grown ostrich
behind him, and as he sits, the waitress comes over and asks
for their order.
The man says, "I'll have a hamburger, fries and a coke," and
turns to the ostrich. "What's yours?" "I'll have the same,"
says the ostrich.
A short time later the waitress returns with the order.
"That will be $6.40 please," and the man reaches into his
pocket and pulls out exact change for payment.
The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the
man says, "I'll have a hamburger, fries and a coke," and
the ostrich says, "I'll have the same."
Once again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with
exact change.
This becomes a routine until late one evening, the two
enter again.
"The usual?" asks the waitress.
"No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked
potato and salad," says the man. "Same for me," says the
ostrich.
A short time later the waitress comes with the order and
says,"That will be $12.62." Once again the man pulls exact
change out of his pocket and places it on the table. The
waitress can't hold back her curiosity any longer.
"Excuse me, sir. How do you manage to always come up
with the exact change out of your pocket every time?"
"Well," says the man, "several years ago I was cleaning
the attic and I found an old lamp. When I rubbed it a
Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish
was that if I ever had to pay for anything, just put my hand
in my pocket, and the right amount of money would always
be there."
"That's brilliant!" says the waitress. "Most people would
wish for a million dollars or something, but you'll always
be as rich as you want for as long as you live!"
"That's right! Whether it's a gallon of milk or a Rolls
Royce, the exact money is always there," says the man.
The waitress asks, "One other thing, sir, what's with the
ostrich?"
The man sighs and answers, "My second wish was for a tall
chick with long legs who agrees with everything I say!"
 
American Management

A Japanese company and an American company decided to have a canoe
race on the Missouri River.

Both the teams practiced hard and long to reach their peak performance
before the race.

On the big day the Japanese won by a mile.

Afterward, the American team became very discouraged and morally
depressed. The American management decided the reason for the crushing defeat had
to be found.

A "Management Team" made up of senior management was formed to
investigate and recommend appropriate action.

Their conclusion was: The Japanese had 8 people rowing and 1 person
steering, while the American team had 8 persons steering and one
person rowing.

So American management hired a consulting company and paid them an
incredible amount of money.

They advised that too many people were steering the boat, while not
enough people were rowing.

To prevent losing to the Japanese again next year, the rowing team's
management structure was totally reorganized to 4 steering
supervisors, 3 rear steering superintendents and 1 assistant superintendent steering
manager.

They also implemented a new performance system that would give the 1
person rowing the boat greater incentive to work harder.

It was called the "Rowing Team Quality First Program," with meetings,
dinners and free pens for the rower.
 
Re: So is Hrithik

Originally posted by JaxGC
A popular bar had a new robotic bartender installed. A guy came in for a..............
A third guy came in to the bar. As with the others, the robot asked him,
"What's your IQ?"
The man replied, "70".
The robot then said, "So, what's the Democratic Party up to these days?
Click to expand...
Another Guys came in , the Robot asked him " what is your IQ sir ?"
He repplied 'Zero"
The robot started talking "Where do you invest your billion dollars ?" :D:D
 
quote:
----------------------------
Another Guys came in , the Robot asked him " what is your IQ sir ?"
He repplied 'Zero"
The robot started talking "Where do you invest your billion dollars ?"
-----------------------------------


Is that you with Zero IQ... :)
 
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