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[GodHelpUsGC]

Waited for someone to start the thread, but did not want to break the tradition

Bank Robbery
==========
From an article which appeared in the Dublin Times about a bank robbery on March 2.

Once inside the bank, shortly after midnight their efforts at disabling the security system got underway immediately.

The robbers, who expected to find one or two large safes filled with cash and valuables, were surprised to see hundreds of smaller safes scattered throughout the bank. The robbers cracked the first safe's combination, and inside they found only a bowl of vanilla pudding. As recorded on the bank's audiotape system, one robber said, "At least we'll have a bit to eat. The robbers opened up a second safe, and it also contained nothing but vanilla pudding. The process continued until all the safes were opened. They found not one pound sterling, a diamond, or ounce of gold.

Instead, all the safes contained covered bowls of pudding. Disappointed, the robbers made a quiet exit, each leaving with
nothing more than a queasy, comfortably full stomach.

The newspaper headline read:

IRELAND'S LARGEST SPERM BANK ROBBED EARLY THIS MORNING

 

[desichoraNo1]

That must be some effort involved to produce a bowl of pudding

 

[waytoolong]

the Dublin times eh ? Well, this one is from the Toronto post-dispatch.

When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300°C.

The Russians used a pencil.

this one's from somewhere in the U.K.
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!” The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!”

The man says: “You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you.”

these are home grown PJs

Two fish in a tank : One turns to the other and says “Do you know how to drive this?”
What do you call a monkey in a minefield ? A Baboom !
Which day of the week do fish hate?....... Fry-Day

 

[1amShantanuB]

Here one on Lalloooo

After completing a jigsaw puzzle he'd been working on for quite
sometime, Lalloo proudly shows off the finished puzzle to a friend. "It took me ONLY 5 MONTHS TO DO IT," Laloo brags.

"FIVE MONTHS? THAT'S TOO LONG." the friend exclaims.

"YOU ARE A FOOL," Lalloo replies.
"READ THE BOX, IT SAYS 5-7 YEARS."

 

[waytoolong]

1amShantanuB

you are BankeBihari2003 aren't you ?

 

[achyuth]

Ewww!!! That's a nasty one - the first one.

 

[1amShantanuB]

One more on lallooo

Once Laloo was coming out of an airport. As there was huge rush thesecurity guard told Laloo "Wait, please." Lalloo said, "65 kilo," and moved on...

 

[desichoraNo1]

That must be some effort involved to produce a bowl of pudding

 

[delhiwala]

NOTEBOOK: They’ve got male

Perhaps the heat is finally getting to students. Manish Singh from Sasaram, Bihar walked into the all-women’s Daulat Ram College and deposited an application for himself. His remark after submitting the form: "The number of guys applying here seems quite less."