A Patan was buying a TV.
"Do you have color TVs?" "Sure."
"Give me a green one, please."
*******************************************************************
Patan calls P.I.A.(Pakistan airlines) "How long does it take
to fly to Karachi?"
Just a sec," says the rep.
Thank you." says the Patan and hangs up.
*******************************************************************
EMPLOYMENT..
This Patan was filling up an application form
for a job. He promptly filled the columns titled NAME,AGE,ADDRESS etc. Then he came to the column
"Salary Expected" : He was not sure as to what to be filled
there. After much thought he wrote : Yes
*******************************************************************
CROCODILE BOOTS..
Patan proposes to a woman. She says yes if
you bring me a pair of crocodile boots. He sets off to Africa and disappears.
Finally a search is being made, they find him hunting crocodiles and watch him killing a huge one
He walks over the reptile, checks its legs and angrily exclaims "71st and again bare feet!"
*********************************************************************
A Patan goes into a store and sees a shiny object. He asks the
clerk, "What is that shiny object?"
The clerk replies, "That is a thermos flask."
The Patan then asks,” What does it do?" The clerk responds, "It keeps hot things hot and it keeps cold things cold." The Patan says, "I'll take it!"
The next day, he walks into work with his new thermos. His Baluchistan boss sees him and asks, "What is that shiny object with you?" He said, "It's a thermos flask."
The boss then says, "What does it do?" He replies,” It keeps hot
things hot and cold things cold." The boss said, "Wow, what do
you have in it?" The Patan replies, "Two cups of coffee and a coke."
*********************************************************************** What will a Patan do after taking photocopies?
He will compare it with the original for spelling mistakes!!
***********************************************************************
Patan went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I
would like to buy this small TV," he told the salesman.
"Sorry, we don't sell to Patans," he replied. He hurried home removed topi and changed his hair style, and returned to tell the salesman "I would like to buy this TV." "Sorry, we don't sell to patans ," Salesman replied. Patan then taught "Damn, he recognized me," . Then he went for a complete disguise
this time, haircut and new hair color, new outfit, big sunglasses, then waited a few days before he again approached the salesman. "I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to patans," he replied. Frustrated, he
exclaimed "How do you know I'm a Patan?"
"Because that's a microwave," he replied.
***********************************************************************
Why did 18 patans go to a movie?
Because below 18 was not allowed.
**********************************************************************
How do you measure a patans intelligence?
Stick a tire pressure gauge in his ear
***********************************************************************
What do you do when a patans throws a hand grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.
***********************************************************************
What do you do when a patans throws a pin at you?
Run like crazy....he's got a hand grenade in his mouth.
***********************************************************************
How do you make a patan laugh on Saturday?
Tell him a joke on Wednesday.
***********************************************************************
What is the patan doing when he holds his hands tightly over his
ears?
Trying to hold on to a thought.
* * * * * *
Why do patan work seven days a week?
So you don't have to re-train them on Monday.
* * * * * *
Why can't patan make ice cubes?
They always forget the recipe.
* * * * * *
How did the patan try to kill the bird?
He threw it off a cliff.
* * * * * *
What do you call 10 patans standing ear to ear?
A wind tunnel.
* * * * * *
What do you see when you look into a patan’s eyes?
The back of his head.
* * * * * *
Why does patans always smile during lightning storms?
They think their picture is being taken.
* * * * * *
Why does patans have "TGIF" written on their shoes?
Toes Go In First.
* * * * * *
How can you tell when patans sends you a fax?
It has a Stamp on it.
* * * * * *
How do you get patan on the roof?
Tell him the drinks are on the house.
* * * * * *
"Oh, look at the dead bird."
Patan looked skyward and said "Where, Where?
* * * * * *
What do smart Patan and UFOs have in common?
You always hear about them but you never see them.
* * * * * *
Why does it take longer to build a patan snowman as opposed to a regular one?
You have to hollow out the head.
* * * * * *
TO LOSE WEIGHT..
The doctor told patan that if he ran eight
kilometers a day for 300 days, he would loose 34 kilos. At the end of 300 days, patan called the doctor to report he had lost the weight, but he had a problem.
"What's the problem?" asked the doctor.
"I'm 2400 kms from home."
* * * * * *
Having lost his donkey a patan, got down to
his knees and started thanking God. A passerby saw him and asked, "Your donkey is missing; what are you thanking God for ?" The patan replied "I am thanking Him for seeing to it that I wasn't riding the donkey
at that time, otherwise I would have been missing too."
*************
Patan was in Karachi. He is walking on a street which has a Clock
Tower when someone asks him if he wants to buy the clock on the Tower.
Patan says "Yes". "Give me a thousand rupees and I'll go get a ladder." The man took the thousand and disappeared. Having waited for several hours the Patan figured he was taken for a ride.
On the next day the Patan is again walking along the same street and the same man asks him to buy the clock. "Give me a thousand rupees and I'll go get a ladder." The Patan gives him the thousand and says "I am not a fool. This time, you wait and I'll go get a ladder."
* * * * * *
A Patan with two red ears went to his doctor. The doctor asked him what had happened to his ears and he answered, " I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang - but instead of picking up the phone I
accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear." " Oh Dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. "But ....what happened to your other ear?" "The scoundrel called back."
"Do you have color TVs?" "Sure."
"Give me a green one, please."
*******************************************************************
Patan calls P.I.A.(Pakistan airlines) "How long does it take
to fly to Karachi?"
Just a sec," says the rep.
Thank you." says the Patan and hangs up.
*******************************************************************
EMPLOYMENT..
This Patan was filling up an application form
for a job. He promptly filled the columns titled NAME,AGE,ADDRESS etc. Then he came to the column
"Salary Expected" : He was not sure as to what to be filled
there. After much thought he wrote : Yes
*******************************************************************
CROCODILE BOOTS..
Patan proposes to a woman. She says yes if
you bring me a pair of crocodile boots. He sets off to Africa and disappears.
Finally a search is being made, they find him hunting crocodiles and watch him killing a huge one
He walks over the reptile, checks its legs and angrily exclaims "71st and again bare feet!"
*********************************************************************
A Patan goes into a store and sees a shiny object. He asks the
clerk, "What is that shiny object?"
The clerk replies, "That is a thermos flask."
The Patan then asks,” What does it do?" The clerk responds, "It keeps hot things hot and it keeps cold things cold." The Patan says, "I'll take it!"
The next day, he walks into work with his new thermos. His Baluchistan boss sees him and asks, "What is that shiny object with you?" He said, "It's a thermos flask."
The boss then says, "What does it do?" He replies,” It keeps hot
things hot and cold things cold." The boss said, "Wow, what do
you have in it?" The Patan replies, "Two cups of coffee and a coke."
*********************************************************************** What will a Patan do after taking photocopies?
He will compare it with the original for spelling mistakes!!
***********************************************************************
Patan went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I
would like to buy this small TV," he told the salesman.
"Sorry, we don't sell to Patans," he replied. He hurried home removed topi and changed his hair style, and returned to tell the salesman "I would like to buy this TV." "Sorry, we don't sell to patans ," Salesman replied. Patan then taught "Damn, he recognized me," . Then he went for a complete disguise
this time, haircut and new hair color, new outfit, big sunglasses, then waited a few days before he again approached the salesman. "I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to patans," he replied. Frustrated, he
exclaimed "How do you know I'm a Patan?"
"Because that's a microwave," he replied.
***********************************************************************
Why did 18 patans go to a movie?
Because below 18 was not allowed.
**********************************************************************
How do you measure a patans intelligence?
Stick a tire pressure gauge in his ear
***********************************************************************
What do you do when a patans throws a hand grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.
***********************************************************************
What do you do when a patans throws a pin at you?
Run like crazy....he's got a hand grenade in his mouth.
***********************************************************************
How do you make a patan laugh on Saturday?
Tell him a joke on Wednesday.
***********************************************************************
What is the patan doing when he holds his hands tightly over his
ears?
Trying to hold on to a thought.
* * * * * *
Why do patan work seven days a week?
So you don't have to re-train them on Monday.
* * * * * *
Why can't patan make ice cubes?
They always forget the recipe.
* * * * * *
How did the patan try to kill the bird?
He threw it off a cliff.
* * * * * *
What do you call 10 patans standing ear to ear?
A wind tunnel.
* * * * * *
What do you see when you look into a patan’s eyes?
The back of his head.
* * * * * *
Why does patans always smile during lightning storms?
They think their picture is being taken.
* * * * * *
Why does patans have "TGIF" written on their shoes?
Toes Go In First.
* * * * * *
How can you tell when patans sends you a fax?
It has a Stamp on it.
* * * * * *
How do you get patan on the roof?
Tell him the drinks are on the house.
* * * * * *
"Oh, look at the dead bird."
Patan looked skyward and said "Where, Where?
* * * * * *
What do smart Patan and UFOs have in common?
You always hear about them but you never see them.
* * * * * *
Why does it take longer to build a patan snowman as opposed to a regular one?
You have to hollow out the head.
* * * * * *
TO LOSE WEIGHT..
The doctor told patan that if he ran eight
kilometers a day for 300 days, he would loose 34 kilos. At the end of 300 days, patan called the doctor to report he had lost the weight, but he had a problem.
"What's the problem?" asked the doctor.
"I'm 2400 kms from home."
* * * * * *
Having lost his donkey a patan, got down to
his knees and started thanking God. A passerby saw him and asked, "Your donkey is missing; what are you thanking God for ?" The patan replied "I am thanking Him for seeing to it that I wasn't riding the donkey
at that time, otherwise I would have been missing too."
*************
Patan was in Karachi. He is walking on a street which has a Clock
Tower when someone asks him if he wants to buy the clock on the Tower.
Patan says "Yes". "Give me a thousand rupees and I'll go get a ladder." The man took the thousand and disappeared. Having waited for several hours the Patan figured he was taken for a ride.
On the next day the Patan is again walking along the same street and the same man asks him to buy the clock. "Give me a thousand rupees and I'll go get a ladder." The Patan gives him the thousand and says "I am not a fool. This time, you wait and I'll go get a ladder."
* * * * * *
A Patan with two red ears went to his doctor. The doctor asked him what had happened to his ears and he answered, " I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang - but instead of picking up the phone I
accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear." " Oh Dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. "But ....what happened to your other ear?" "The scoundrel called back."