roran, ms001:
you are right, i keep those two totally separate as well. i could not imagine how someone can mix those two. after all it is your life. getting the gc is a totally different thing. getting married is a different decision. for example it may happen that i get my gc being single and then marry an american girl simply because that is how things fall. timing is not always in your control. and i will not have any regrets whatsoever that i did not marry her before even if i knew her during the gc processing time. it is important that we both are ready to take that decision.
now as far as marrying an american vs. desi is concerned that is a different discussion. and indeed an interesting one. it is always perceived that american girls cannot make roti. the truth is that an american has never made roti in her life. you can always teach her. it depends on how open she is. i have seen a friend of mine who married an american and she happily prepares roti. same thing goes with many other things. and then there is always the question of family acceptance, living in india vs abroad, friend circle, language, religion and the list goes on... i say one should take the decision to spend their life with the person they feel they can spend their life with. what ever your criteria is. beauty or inner strength or brain or money or something else. all differences and other nuances either disappear with time or get small enough to ignore.
also, for all the desis who are now settled here and insist on getting an indian spouse. i would suggest they think about the fact that if they are not marrying an american then their kids growing here will. if not then their kids. it is only a matter of time. just think about it. who will break the famliy tradition. chinese have been in us for several generations and you see a lot more american chinese here. similarly indians in america are slowly headed towards inter cultural marriages. we see it slowly because a) indians have been in us only for 3 decades or so and b) indians are lot more culture bound
you are right, i keep those two totally separate as well. i could not imagine how someone can mix those two. after all it is your life. getting the gc is a totally different thing. getting married is a different decision. for example it may happen that i get my gc being single and then marry an american girl simply because that is how things fall. timing is not always in your control. and i will not have any regrets whatsoever that i did not marry her before even if i knew her during the gc processing time. it is important that we both are ready to take that decision.
now as far as marrying an american vs. desi is concerned that is a different discussion. and indeed an interesting one. it is always perceived that american girls cannot make roti. the truth is that an american has never made roti in her life. you can always teach her. it depends on how open she is. i have seen a friend of mine who married an american and she happily prepares roti. same thing goes with many other things. and then there is always the question of family acceptance, living in india vs abroad, friend circle, language, religion and the list goes on... i say one should take the decision to spend their life with the person they feel they can spend their life with. what ever your criteria is. beauty or inner strength or brain or money or something else. all differences and other nuances either disappear with time or get small enough to ignore.
also, for all the desis who are now settled here and insist on getting an indian spouse. i would suggest they think about the fact that if they are not marrying an american then their kids growing here will. if not then their kids. it is only a matter of time. just think about it. who will break the famliy tradition. chinese have been in us for several generations and you see a lot more american chinese here. similarly indians in america are slowly headed towards inter cultural marriages. we see it slowly because a) indians have been in us only for 3 decades or so and b) indians are lot more culture bound