Met husband outside the country, should I say that in the interview?

L

Lunastar

Registered Users (C)
OK,

here's a touchy topic.
My husband and I met in the country I was living in before I moved here. He came in where I was working, and we just talked and talked for the rest of the day. The next day, he came back to the US (he was visiting a friend outside the US). But we exchanged information, and from that day on, we talked every single day on the phone about 6 hours (yeap, looong talks), and exchaged emails and text messages the rest of the day.
This went on for some months, until he invited me over here for my vacations for a couple of weeks. I came over, and that would be officially when we started dating.
I went back, and after some months, he came to visit me for a couple of weeks.
Later on, we realised that I had the chance to take one semester off University (was studying full time) and spend it in the US, both to spend some time with him, and also cause I was studying photography and I thought we could visit some cities here and I would get interesting material for my portfolio.
I got a B2 Visa, and arranged everything so that I could return to my studies and work after the 6 months were over.
I WAS NOT planning on getting married. When I arrived, the officer at the POE asked me a LOT of questions about our relationship and if we were engaged. I said no, which is true.

Now the time of our interview is coming and I'm wondering what to say about it. If I say that we started dating before I came here, they may think I was planning on marrying and staying here (I've heard of people to whom this happened) and deny me based on that. On the other hand, not saying that would be lying, and I would lose a lot of things supporting our relationship (all the emails we exchanged, pictures of a trip together, and so on).

What do you think I should do? I heard of a woman who was in a similar situation as I, she said they met here, and she had no problems. I just feel uneasy lying, and I bet my husband would too.

Any tips or experiences will be appreciated.

Thanks.
 
My husband and I actually met through a friend, and over the phone.. as he was in FLA and I was in Canada.. he came up to meet me, and then I came to visit him.. 3 months later I came down here for what was supposed to be a visit.. and then we got married. So kinda the same thing..
Be honest with them I think. I swear they can sniff out a lie.. and each lie you tell, you have to remember it! You might trip over it too later in the interview.. If you have nothing to be in trouble for, there is no need to panic. Be honest!
Did you find the link to my whole experience at the Tampa AOS office?
 
During the interview they often ask when and how couple met, or if they dated/lived together before the marriage. Tell them the truth.
I think it is in your advantage too – proves that you knew your husband before you came to US and you two had a relationship before you decided to get married. It’s all good.
Plus – you didn’t lie at POE. You two weren’t engaged at that time. Things like this just happen on their own. You’ll be all right, do not stress out. See my PM.
 
Thanks for the tips.

I did find the link useful, Canadiangirl, it's good to know that it goes that easy sometimes. I figured they were watching before you got in the interview, but I guess we always look like a couple... I mean, we're not all over each other all the time, but you get the picture.

I figured the right thing to do was to tell the truth, as I said before, I don't feel comfortable hiding that, and I bet my husband would trip on it eventually (or me!). It just makes me a bit uneasy to think that they may start thinking that I came here with plans to marry but didn't get a fiancee Visa.
I read previously (I think in some post here) that this happened to a woman, who said the truth, and then went on to have a serious of problems because of this. I know they have no proof of anything, but they're still pretty sneaky and can make your life impossible if they want to.
I mean we're definitely gonna have to say that I came here before to visit, and so did he, I'm just not sure how much to specify the extent of our relationship (man, even I wasn't sure what it was before I came here!), or if I should introduce our emails...
Canadiangirl, did the officer say anything about you knowing your husband before? Did he ask you when exactly you guys started dating?
 
I really hope they don't get too into it with you! I know that I really wouldn't want them reading out emails, so I didn't even bring them.
They did ask how we met, and we got into some long winded story.. (my husband's best friend from highschool is dating this woman whom I have known for years.. blah blah.. she wanted us to meet, we eventually did) after about 10 minutes of us trying to explain it, he started to kinda glaze over.. I was giving him date after date.. the first day I emailed him, the first time we talked on the phone, the first time he came up to Canada.. the first time I came down here.. haha. So short answers are best.. but if they look interested, go into it. We actually took turns telling parts of it.
If you feel guilty about the truth, they can probably smell that fear/guilt.. (I've decided they have super human powers of deduction) so maybe start telling people your whole story, and get used to telling it?
 
Thanks, Canadiangirl.

Actually, now that I think about it, I don't want them reading my emails either. We should keep at least one think just to ourselves, seeing how we're supposed to show every other personal thing and story.

I don't feel guilty about the truth, why should I? I just have this bad taste left in my mouth, from the bad experience I had at the POE. I went there thinking everything was gonna be alright, and I went through a really tough time, just cause the officer had a bad day. Ever since, I've gotten used to thinking that they'll always think the worst of me, and I have to prove them wrong.
I guess I thought if I skipped the part where we started dating before I got here, then there would be no grounds for them to attack me. But if you say you went through the same thing and it was no problem...

I think I still have the letter from my former employer that says I'll get my job back when I get back to the country. My employer gave me that letter to show when I went to get my B2 Visa. They didn't even look at it.
Maybe I can show them that if they start asking too many questions :p
 
Hey,

I've heard from more people that the relationship they had before finally arriving in the country could cause them problems, is there anyone else out there who went through the same experience and have some info about how the interview went?

Just to ease all of our minds, please. Or drive us insane :p
 
Lunastar, don't think too much about it. You will do fine. There is nothing wrong that you met your husband before, I met mine in the same way! and I got the same trouble at the POE for the first time in my life! I got so mad but after my hubby was waiting for me in the stairs in the baggage claim I forgot about everything else. I think it was the POE we enter via Houston and most of the time I always used MIA or directly to ATL, but the fares were cheaper through IAH that is why my husband bought the tickets that way. I will never never will use that airport again.

So be peace in mind and relax. I wouldn't do anything different because it was meant to be in that way, we look about USCIS after we got married! If you really make things by love it wasn't possible to plan and know too much stuff, and that means in their eyes you will act like that, with normal things that normal really in love couples do. If they don't get it oh well my husband should start change of work and language because I am not dying to live in here. I had a very good job in my country.
Have fun and good luck!
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Lunastar said:
Hey,

I've heard from more people that the relationship they had before finally arriving in the country could cause them problems, is there anyone else out there who went through the same experience and have some info about how the interview went?

Just to ease all of our minds, please. Or drive us insane :p
Click to expand...

I am new to this forum, but has I am reading this post I realized that we are in the same boat.Two August ago my uncle ( a cop in my country) wanted me to meet this guy he knew that owned a business there. We started talking over the phone (long distance bill went high), emails, IMs, chatrooms. We started visiting each other and in July 2005 I went home and visited him. InNovember he came fo ra visit and that is all it was suppose to be, however, my heart was thinking something else. I proposed and he accepted (even though he has a fear of marriage). I was waiting fo a year later to get married however it did not happen like that. By December we were married (thank god!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) I love this guy so muchhhhhhhhhhhhhh, however he had to go back home. I have to wait until April before I see him again( I am gonna visit him) and in September he will be coming back fo ranother visit. It is not really like yours but kindda similar.

I would like to know how things go fo ryou, keep the posts coming.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top