marriage

[ivston]

I am one of the DV2008 winners. However I do have an important issue to resolve, for which I would like to hear your advice. I have a girlfriend, who I've been with for almost 2 years and which I love a lot. I am 21 years old and my girlfriend is 20. As far as I have been told by now - the only way I can take her with me in the USA i to marry her before the interview or at least before I enter the US. But marriage is an important decision, for which I still do not feel ready enough to take. My reluctance is not because I believe that I'll take the wrong decison by marring her, but because I believe that it is not the right time to do it. A man marries when he is willing, able and ready to support a family. I certainly can not say this about myslef. I just finished university and I earn as much as to be able to support myself and pay my loans. A normal wedding (one which she definitely deserves) in my country costs almosts as much as my income for a year and half. Alternative wedding is one in which we will just sign in front of few witnesses, but you will agree that this is not a wedding for which any woman would dream, it is not the wedding for which I dream also.
Moreover if the consular officer wants to see photos from our wedding, he/she could interpret and suspect it as fictisious one (usually such weddings would occur between an alien and a US citizen for the purpose of the alien to obtain a green card).
Is there any altenative way by which I could take her with me, besides marriage? What if she comes to the US by another visa and we marry in the US? Could she get a status, which will allow her to stay in the US?

 

[Catseyes]

Ultimately, it's your decision.
I had to get married quickly. I'm a female who had dreamed of a fairy tale wedding. Well, there was only me, him and the officer. But I'm married as much as any other couple who had a big reception.
You could always do a reception later. That's waht I had planned to do initially.

In my opinion, the most important thing to prove that your relationship is truthful is not wedding pictures. Even if you had met the girl 2 weeks ago you could still have wedding pictures. I would recommend proofs that you have known each other / been dating for quite some time ( like good old fashionned pictures with the date on, pictures of family events that both of you attended, lease contracts or bills with both your names...)

There are other options, but the 2 of you being GC holder is easy ( "just" get married ).

 

[ivston]

Re

Thank you very much for your answer.
Yes this is true that the pictures from the wedding are not a proof "per se". But the consular officer probably would like to see them. Two people who have a ficticious wedding are very unlikely to make a great reception, inviting 100 guests, not only because of the costs, but because they usually try to conceal it from their friends and relatives. A marriage without reception is much more likely to be ficticious. Than a much greater burden would lie on us to prove the contrary. I guess that the insufficient finances would not be a good excuse, because a normal question would follow: "Where do you have money to go then".

Unfortunately we can't give common bills and we can't prove that we have lived together, because for those two years we lived in a student dormitory (away from the towns we were born in), which rules forbid by any means the offical sharing of a room from representatives of different genders.

The only proof that we have are pictures - but I belive that this not more different than the pictures from the wedding. Two people with fictious marriage could easily take 100 and more pictures after they know that they will need them and the date on the photo is easily manipulated through the digital camera settings.

Unfortunately love is something intangible and it is difficult to be proven by tangible means.