Marriage doomed

[machelon]

I agree on this, even though many people in the world are not given these liberties.
Immigrants or perspective immigrants do not have any right to immigrate.
The US citizen has the right to file a petition in their favor, having met certain requirements.
If this falls, then there's no right to be claimed. That's why are called immigration "benefits".

I agree with those who called upon you to refrain from judging the actions or questioning the OP. No one needs to hear you think of yourself as the "angel" of immigration...no one knows you...so no one really knows for sure you ARE. In the same way...you don't know others...so just give the needed advice for the OP to succeed in his life, but if you don't have any just go back to your own mirrow and complimentd yourself on how good you are. But don't throw it around here.
In my opinion...the desire to immigrate is one of the most NOBLE and powerfull feelings that humans have. It is thanks to that desire that we have evolved in who and where we are. Not everyone has the right to GET a green card..I accept...but I'll always be on the side of immigrants...and HELp them anyway i can.
Sarrebal..you are not an immigration officer...if you'd like to be one go apply they're looking for many. But this forum looks for neutral...good advice...without the "i am an angel" attitude.

 

[cherr1980]

Most of the people who have been married for less than 2 years or even 5 years, knows how difficult, crazy and stressing can be the first years. So for whatever bad discussion or no communication at all it can be address in a more positive way. To live with a person different than you (not saying about how many issues you have in common that's nothing if you have to sleep with the person after a disagreement!) it's a normal part of a marriage especially at the beginning. And if you are pretty young, things can be looking as a doom marriage even there are many posibilities to go in a more constructive way.

Many times people post here about their marriage and they even don't have 2 years of marriage and that everything is done, end, that their spouse will withdraw, etc, etc. People under stress and anger (and since we will never know the other side of the story) said things that they really don't want to say, to hurt you, to make you feel bad, etc. Marriage life is difficult. I am not saying that if things are pretty bad, like the person cheat on you, or is abusive to you of course get out of there...but simple because a discussion is not address in a constructive way (which again is difficult) means that is the end of your marriage.

Saying this, I know that is stressing to know that you move and all that because your marriage. If you did so because of that (and then it come the part that you just have been living here a few months and you said already that you don't pretend to go back, but it's your call) in your post your adjustment of status came more relevant than your marriage. I know that issue can be understandable but check your own words that looks (and many times people in this forum post like that) your green card is more valuable than your marriage, when is through your marriage that you are getting that benefit.

I am not pre judging you and I know that sometimes people post here more in stress and choose some phrases that can be misinterpreted. When a person post about "my marriage is ending" but what about my green card then? Looks like there are priorities set and people can take (remember this is internet and people don't know you and don't have to) it in the wrong way if that is the case. And look I am not saying that your marriage is a sham or that I think that you prefer your green card than your marriage.

Scenario 1: If your wife withdraw her petition before the green card approval (interview approval) you won't get the green card.

Scenario 2: If your wife does not appear at the interview, probably you will get a second interview or convince your wife to appears. At the interview your role is to demostrate that you did not enter in that relationship to skip immigration laws. If you wife does not appear you interview could get denied. Unless you try to demostrate that you enter in good faith.

Advice 1: go to counseling. If you don't have the money buy the book that is call "12 Hours to a Great Marriage".

Advice 2: check with an immigration lawyer what are your possibilities in case you don't get any positive respond from advice #1.

 

[sarrebal]

I agree with those who called upon you to refrain from judging the actions or questioning the OP. No one needs to hear you think of yourself as the "angel" of immigration...no one knows you...so no one really knows for sure you ARE. In the same way...you don't know others...so just give the needed advice for the OP to succeed in his life, but if you don't have any just go back to your own mirrow and complimentd yourself on how good you are. But don't throw it around here.
In my opinion...the desire to immigrate is one of the most NOBLE and powerfull feelings that humans have. It is thanks to that desire that we have evolved in who and where we are. Not everyone has the right to GET a green card..I accept...but I'll always be on the side of immigrants...and HELp them anyway i can.
Sarrebal..you are not an immigration officer...if you'd like to be one go apply they're looking for many. But this forum looks for neutral...good advice...without the "i am an angel" attitude.

I don't care what you think. I will never advocate illegal immigration as you do. And that includes sham marriages. Read what I wrote. Immigrating is as noble as staying in your own country, as long as you respect the law. And in this case I've been definitely more neutral than you. Just read again what I wrote.

 

[machelon]

In this case I honestly don't know. But if I were to divorce to my wife anytime soon I would be devastated, and the possibility of losing my gc would be the last of my worries.

this is a forum for immigration realated issues....what do you expect the OP to write??? about his relationship and his feelings? he has his family and his close freinds for that kind of advice...I completely understand why he looked for advice about his GC here.

And going ahead with it and pretend to be happy and married just to get a gc is a fraud even if the marriage has been in bona-fide before.

No one needs to hear this preaching...it's trivial stuff...everyone knows what a sham marriage is.
And whats with the "i feel morally superior than other green card holders" ...????.....who the hell do you think you are?? you don't know the OP...or his relationship...or anybody in this forum...so in no WAY you are above or below anybody here. It just sickens me when people like you begin to take the morality stand.
Lets just give poeple advice on how to play by the rules. THAT's IT !!!
go to your mom if you want to tell anybody about how superior you think you are.

 

[machelon]

You offer neutral, good advice? Please...

YES, always.

Even though I may have written my own opinions on other issues in another threads, I always want to help people in this forum so they don't get in trouble with immigration laws.

It is simply a matter of playing by the rules...and leaving our own feelings or opinions behind.

So i always look out for those like Sarebal who venture into the morality comments which is not the real porpuse of this forum.

 

[sarrebal]

No one needs to hear this preaching...it's trivial stuff...everyone knows what a sham marriage is.

I think you would agree that having your soon-to-be-divorced wife sign the petition and go to the interview and pretend they're a happy couple is a sham.

 

[sarrebal]

YES, always.

Even though I may have written my own opinions on other issues in another threads, I always want to help people in this forum so they don't get in trouble with immigration laws.

It is simply a matter of playing by the rules...and leaving our own feelings or opinions behind.

So i always look out for those like Sarebal who venture into the morality comments which is not the real porpuse of this forum.

Hahahahaha.
Play by the rules! Cross the border illegally. Be a slave so I could have a cheap salad. And then pretend to be legalized. I hope, at least for the person who signed the affidavit of support for you, that you never decide to become an immigration lawyer.

 

[pianoplayer]

Hahahahaha.
Play by the rules! Cross the border illegally. Be a slave so I could have a cheap salad. And then pretend to be legalized. I hope, at least for the person who signed the affidavit of support for you, that you never decide to become an immigration lawyer.

Be careful what you say Sarrebal....Machelon may decide to call you the DR Phil of immigration too ---- a title which was bestowed on me by Machelon, and which I prefer to keep to myself lol.

Don't worry, in my opinion Machelon with his/her sense of logical reasoning probably won't even make it through 1L Contracts, never mind immigration law.

 

[sarrebal]

Be careful what you say Sarrebal....Machelon may decide to call you the DR Phil of immigration too ---- a title which was bestowed on me by Machelon, and which I prefer to keep to myself lol.

He hasn't been so kind with me...but I think I'll survive.

 

[machelon]

Be careful what you say Sarrebal....Machelon may decide to call you the DR Phil of immigration too ---- a title which was bestowed on me by Machelon, and which I prefer to keep to myself lol.

Don't worry, in my opinion Machelon with his/her sense of logical reasoning probably won't even make it through 1L Contracts, never mind immigration law.

law school?? that should be a piece of cake....my wife is lawyer from Boalt... i helped her with her LSATs and we had endless discutons about her clases. You guys might have just given me the right incentive to go to law school just now.

She also thinks, as well as many of her smart friends that immigration law is more messed up than Iraq.
The money sure seems very attractive though.

 

[sarrebal]

law school?? that should be a piece of cake....my wife is lawyer from Boalt... i helped her with her LSATs and we had endless discutons about her clases. You guys might have just given me the right incentive to go to law school just now.

She also thinks, as well as many of her smart friends that immigration law is more messed up than Iraq.
The money sure seems very attractive though.

I doubt your wife will ever give the same advice that you give on this board.
If you decide to become an immigration lawyer...then good luck to you! ...and to your future clients...

 

[machelon]

I never gave bad advice in this board....I gave some personal opinions...but I am entitled to that as you are as well.

 

[pianoplayer]

I never gave bad advice in this board....I gave some personal opinions...but I am entitled to that as you are as well.

Granted ---- you are entitled to your personal opinions. I have always hated this quote, b/c I find it somewhat disgusting, but it popped to mind now:
"Opinions are like assholes, everyone has one."

Just a pity that most of your opinions make no legal sense. I too doubt that your wife would write what you do on this NG. Perhaps, when you studied with her, you gave her good practice in dismissing counterarguments. I'm just used to having to argue against better counterarguments I guess. Yours are usually pretty obvious and easy to dismiss.

 

[kevinglenn]

When people post their horrible interview experiences, we rush to console them...some of us are left in shock wondering why any human being professing sanity would connive to make immigration as difficult and complicated as possible for others and then turn around to complain about people choosing the illegal route.

We must remember that the appalling demeanor exhibited by certain immigration officers is nothing but the result of folks(and I reserve derogatory adjectives out of magnanimity) like serrebal and his anal-retentive ilk applying and being accepted as immigration officers.

The constitution is whatever five outta nine appointed-for-life, individually-biased supreme court judges say it is....the law is subject to interpretation and largely subjective!

Like I said, "sham" is subjective...USCIS defines a sham as a marriage ENTERED INTO for the purpose of securing immigration benefits.

A green card is highly desireable, it's not the end of the world tho'...not like they give u a fortune with it...it's just an opportunity to haul ass without fear or hindrance

The real interview is stressful enough without all the preliminary...uhm...(ill)advice that comes with it. I was under the impression this forum was designed to help others not condemn...we all have our opinions and we all have the will-power to exercise restraint from condemning others seeking advice when our personal values contradict the choice they have decided to embark on.

What the hell is the guy supposed to do?...Deport himself?...He just said pigs would fly before he ever decides to go back...

If he makes it...that's one less potential illegal immigrant to deal with...at least he speaks english....oh and he has home equity!

Too many self-righteousness and not enough common sense....May the good Lord protect us from his followers.

Live and let live!

P.S: Serrebal I got some questions for u. If u receive an interview appointment and later receive a cancellation letter even though u never cancelled ur interview...do u show up anyhow or behave like a law-abiding citizen and act upon the cancellation letter?...Yes sir, I thought so

Now on the issue of "sham"(coincidentally a four-letter word )...is it a sham if u intentionally take numerous pictures just for the purpose of the interview even though u're genuinely married?

Is it a "sham" if u'd prefer having separate accounts but u intentionally get a joint account just for the interview even though u're genuinely married?

If u go for the interview and u get approved pending name-check. The name-check takes two years to clear by the time the GC arrives u're divorced...what does ur moral highness suggest?...Returning the GC and deporting urself?...If u decide to keep it does that constitute a sham?

If at the time of ur interview u happen to be having marital problems, do u postpone ur interview till after u solve ur marital issues?...If u do show up do u tell the immigration officer u're having marital issues which might or might not result in a divorce?
RSVP

 

[sarrebal]

I'm sorry this thread turned into personal because some frustrated people decided to do so.
I'm not going to answer to that.

Just want to drop a line... we read about horrible experiences at interviews and rude officers because so many sham, fraudolent...call them whatever you want...marriages have gone through. It's a system self-defense.
Be mad at fake couples that made this happen, not at immigration laws.

 

[sarrebal]

P.S: Serrebal I got some questions for u. If u receive an interview appointment and later receive a cancellation letter even though u never cancelled ur interview...do u show up anyhow or behave like a law-abiding citizen and act upon the cancellation letter?...Yes sir, I thought so

If I receive a new appointment before, then I wouldn't worry about. If I don't, I'd definitely investigate though.

Now on the issue of "sham"(coincidentally a four-letter word )...is it a sham if u intentionally take numerous pictures just for the purpose of the interview even though u're genuinely married?

Why would you take more pictures for that? People take pictures all the time for any purpose. Kinda normal to take them at the wedding btw. And you're not required to bring a million pictures at the interview.

Is it a "sham" if u'd prefer having separate accounts but u intentionally get a joint account just for the interview even though u're genuinely married?

It is not, but unfortunately it became an unspoken rule, due to the high number of frauds.

If u go for the interview and u get approved pending name-check. The name-check takes two years to clear by the time the GC arrives u're divorced...what does ur moral highness suggest?...Returning the GC and deporting urself?...If u decide to keep it does that constitute a sham?

If you're ok at the interview, then it's fine. I know people that after having divorced came back to their countries. It's up to you.

If at the time of ur interview u happen to be having marital problems, do u postpone ur interview till after u solve ur marital issues?...If u do show up do u tell the immigration officer u're having marital issues which might or might not result in a divorce?
RSVP

Well, you don't understand how it works then. You don't get a green card just because you married a US citizen.
You apply for one because the US citizen you married wants you to stay (signing the petition). If he/she doesn't, then you have no right to apply for a gc whatsoever. So if before the interview the petitioner decides for whatever reason to withdraw the petition, there's absoltely nothing you could do.

 

[JustCounting]

A green card is highly desireable, it's not the end of the world tho'...not like they give u a fortune with it...it's just an opportunity to haul ass without fear or hindrance

Yeah - I guess it's only the person who contracted with the Federal Govt to be responsible for the immigrant who has to worry about liability while the immigrant is out there "hauling ass without hindrance".

What the hell is the guy supposed to do?...Deport himself?...He just said pigs would fly before he ever decides to go back...

That is certainly his decision. It was his decision to stay here on a tourist visa for many years when there are other visas available. Remember, we're talking about GC via marriage here. It's not like there weren't other options. Sure, it'd be nice if marriage were a sure thing, but we all know it isn't.

If he makes it...that's one less potential illegal immigrant to deal with...at least he speaks english....oh and he has home equity!

Kevin, I usually don't disagree with you, and I think you're probably not thinking this one through, but the above statement is enough to send anyone who had worked all their lives to maintain the home they live in running for the hills. How do you figure this guy has home equity because he stated "my name appears on HER house's deed" ? He's only been married, in his own words, "for 6 mos". Logically, it follows he could not possibly have had an EAD or SS# for more than a few months. And if he couldn't get an H1B or Labor Certification or any other visa, what kind of job/money do you think he has/is making; or that he could possibly have any credit history, etc.

I certainly hope you don't agree with the immigrants who are now suing their former spouses/sponsors for Alimony (and getting it) because the Affidavit of Support has been held in court as binding for such.

I know we've strayed off topic here and tempers have flared. I know this is a forum for immigrants and they come here seeking help. But I think we all should remember that behind every AOS by Marriage there is a US Citizen who has put a lot on the line and has a helluva lot to lose if things go bad. And when someone would knowingly and willingly "become illegal" rather than "manup" and follow the rules (fair or unfair as they may be), then I'd not only advise the spouse to withdraw the petition - I'd advise the USC spouse to file for divorce ASAP.