This is not a legal opinion, but I remember quite a few people mentioning the mantra that Green Card is for future employment. This would seem to imply that one can get the Green Card before being employed. Remember that people on H1-B is a slightly different case in which they are already working for the employer, but if you were to apply for Green Card directly (let's say you are on a non-working capacity in the U.S. legally) you could get a Green Card and not be working until after you obtain the Green Card. I don't see it so black and white as this lawyer. I understand that your wife case is more complicated than usual, but if I were you I'd probably not withdraw. I don't know if you've mentioned this before, but what is your status in the U.S.? Did you derive a Green Card through your wife? Anyway, I wish you good luck.