How to change my J-1 status to O-1?

Actually the 2 year home residency requirement does not preclude you from obtaining O-1 status from a J-1 (my husband just successfully did this without fulfilling the requirement). But you must fulfill the 2 year requirement before you can apply for a change of status to permanent resident or any other immigrant category.
 
Likely you will need to fulfill the 2 year requirement - although this can be waived in certain circumstances. It may, however, not be possible to get it waived with intent to immigrate.
 
Likely you will need to fulfill the 2 year requirement - although this can be waived in certain circumstances. It may, however, not be possible to get it waived with intent to immigrate.

Immigrant intent is the main reason to obtain a waiver. If that is in your future, you may as well get it over with now as it is required under 8 CFR 248.2(a)(3) and (4) anyway. See the I-129 instructions also about the waiver requirement. Your dependent will need an I-539 accompanying for O-3 if desired.

See: http://travel.state.gov/visa/temp/info/info_1288.html regarding waiver.
 
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