problems with marriage and possible divorce

Godislove

Registered Users (C)
very new to this forum, any input will be greatly appreciated, got married to my usc husband june 2007 and filed paper work in july, i knew him for 1yr and 3months, we were friends but became romantically involved for 3months and got got married afterwards, it was all wonderful, just the man of my dreams untill last week when i discovered he has been lying to me, when we filed our paper work he declared in there that he has no child and that his mother was dead and that was what he told me before we were married, i haven't met my father in law yet because he said his father abandoned him and he grew up not knowing him though they both live in the same city, he has so much anger for his father but i felt that, with time he will forgive him,anyway to cut a very long story short, i found a picture of him,son and girlfriend with a note at the back, saying ''happy family, we miss you'', i almost collapsed,but i decided to keep my cool and investigate further,i did a thorough search in the house and found a note dated recently from his mom, i could not believe my eyes, i knew everything that i believed in was a lie, infact i don't even know the man i call my husband, finally because of the financial situation in the house [i am the bread winner], has led me to believe that he married me because of the money i saved in my account to start a business with, which i am almost out of since he can hardly keep a job, i pay the rent, buy food and clothing and i have three children from my former husband, which two of them are usc, my ex still takes care of the children, so right now i have receipts of the forms we sent it immigration and i am definitely filing a divorce because when i confronted him, he told me to deal with it, so what are my chances of filing battered women, because as it is now he feels like without him i will be sent home.we have utility in our names, lease, life insurance, auto insurance, bank statement, sams clu membership, blockbuster, pls advice on what to do, thanks for being patient and reading, we have been married for 4mths.
 
you can not file as battered woman if you have not been abused by him. And according to your history he has lied to you but that's it. Unless you have recorded evidence of abuse i think you can not proceed this way.
 
very new to this forum, any input will be greatly appreciated, got married to my usc husband june 2007 and filed paper work in july, i knew him for 1yr and 3months, we were friends but became romantically involved for 3months and got got married afterwards, it was all wonderful, just the man of my dreams untill last week when i discovered he has been lying to me, when we filed our paper work he declared in there that he has no child and that his mother was dead and that was what he told me before we were married, i haven't met my father in law yet because he said his father abandoned him and he grew up not knowing him though they both live in the same city, he has so much anger for his father but i felt that, with time he will forgive him,anyway to cut a very long story short, i found a picture of him,son and girlfriend with a note at the back, saying ''happy family, we miss you'', i almost collapsed,but i decided to keep my cool and investigate further,i did a thorough search in the house and found a note dated recently from his mom, i could not believe my eyes, i knew everything that i believed in was a lie, infact i don't even know the man i call my husband, finally because of the financial situation in the house [i am the bread winner], has led me to believe that he married me because of the money i saved in my account to start a business with, which i am almost out of since he can hardly keep a job, i pay the rent, buy food and clothing and i have three children from my former husband, which two of them are usc, my ex still takes care of the children, so right now i have receipts of the forms we sent it immigration and i am definitely filing a divorce because when i confronted him, he told me to deal with it, so what are my chances of filing battered women, because as it is now he feels like without him i will be sent home.we have utility in our names, lease, life insurance, auto insurance, bank statement, sams clu membership, blockbuster, pls advice on what to do, thanks for being patient and reading, we have been married for 4mths.

So sorry to hear that. I think that if you could prove that the marriage was bona fide you could get the waiver. But please consult with an immigration lawyer that specializes specifically in marriages.

Also, keep track of all findings carefully. This will prove he is a liar and thus not reliable in case he needs to testify against you.

What else can I say, Good luck!
 
It all depends on your individual circumstances.

I understand that you were previously married with 3 children, 2 of whom are USC's.

When did your first marriage end and how long did your first marriage last?
Is your first husband a USC or an LPR?
Did you and your current husband live together?
Did he have a job when you met him?

These are the kinds of questions you will need to be aware of because it is important that you establish that your second marriage was not entered into for the purposes of obtaining a Green Card.

You will have to satisfy an IO down the road assuming that you will be seeking a divorce during the process.

Being that there is no physical abuse against you, you will have an uphill battle trying to convince an IO under these circumstances. But it is not impossible.

The fact that your current husband is a liar is irrelevant. He has not lied to USCIS.

Just wanted to let you be aware of what scrutiny you may face, if any.
 
he is still seeing the woman that had his child and she doesn't know that he is married to me, he told me that, because according to him that will hurt her feelings which i think is the most stupid thing anybody will say to his wife.

Hmmm, confused here...... Is this the same OP?
 
Hmmm, confused here...... Is this the same OP?

How come the comment you quoted by the aforementioned poster I cannot see.

Did the OP take an alternate, respond to peoples questions using the initial user name and then remove delete her mistake?

I'm confused did you get a PM, is that what you are quoting?
 
Looks fishy, take a good look at the two post, does not capitalize anything in her typing. I'm not one to judge, I have read a few of joeie's post, does not seem like her. To the OP, go see an attorney before you do anything drastic.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
pls advice on what to do, thanks for being patient and reading, we have been married for 4mths.

Godislove, I am sorry to hear about your situation.
first of all I would ask you to consider your timeline in this process first. Have you gotten an interview letter yet? if so, is there a way you guys can get to an understanding and you remain calm till the interview is over.
If you choose to take that route, you will have to call USCIS and ask for correctional forms to be sent to you so u can correct the falsified informaion that he gave you during your intial application, because that will be held against you during your interview,, 'cos they officers do their homework by verifying the parents name of the US citizen as stated and any dependent on the birth registry ,,, etc, just from the birth certificate info that he submitted.

Or

If you feel that the situation you are in now is just not gonna work and that you can not stay with this guy for the next 6 months or so, then, a good option will be to write to USCIS including all your receipt notices (Copy) and stating that you want to withdraw your application till further notice, based on.... marrital problems, but do not state divorce yet.
'cos if you do then you will be required to do something about your status and if not be arraigned in removal procceedings which I am sure you do not even want to go there.
Once again sorry about your situation, I can not even imagine what emotional distress that this can bring to someone.
Best of luck.
 
Godislove, I am sorry to hear about your situation.
first of all I would ask you to consider your timeline in this process first. Have you gotten an interview letter yet? if so, is there a way you guys can get to an understanding and you remain calm till the interview is over.
If you choose to take that route, you will have to call USCIS and ask for correctional forms to be sent to you so u can correct the falsified informaion that he gave you during your intial application, because that will be held against you during your interview,, 'cos they officers do their homework by verifying the parents name of the US citizen as stated and any dependent on the birth registry ,,, etc, just from the birth certificate info that he submitted.

Or

If you feel that the situation you are in now is just not gonna work and that you can not stay with this guy for the next 6 months or so, then, a good option will be to write to USCIS including all your receipt notices (Copy) and stating that you want to withdraw your application till further notice, based on.... marrital problems, but do not state divorce yet.
'cos if you do then you will be required to do something about your status and if not be arraigned in removal procceedings which I am sure you do not even want to go there.
Once again sorry about your situation, I can not even imagine what emotional distress that this can bring to someone.
Best of luck.

You talk about 6 months. I thought that since they just got married (less than 2 years) , she would only get the Conditional GC now, and have to wait 2 years to get UGC?

Anyway whoever that is, I hope it goes ok for you OP.
 
Also, whether you are married or not to the USC. Once you withdraw your AOS petition, if your I-94 or status has expired. You are out of status and deportable. USCIS will not care if you are married to the USC and are out of status. They will not wait until you file for AOS again.
 
You talk about 6 months. I thought that since they just got married (less than 2 years) , she would only get the Conditional GC now, and have to wait 2 years to get UGC?

Anyway whoever that is, I hope it goes ok for you OP.

Yes, afetr getting her TGC or CGC, she can file and remove the conditional by herself with evidence of batteredness that led to divorce and will be granted, but she will have to have the evidence. They don't have to file jointly for the removal of the conditional period. Don't get me wrong, its the best thing to do, i mean filling jointly, but can be waived with circumstatial evidence, like i mentioned above.
 
Yes, afetr getting her TGC or CGC, she can file and remove the conditional by herself with evidence of batteredness that led to divorce and will be granted, but she will have to have the evidence. They don't have to file jointly for the removal of the conditional period. Don't get me wrong, its the best thing to do, i mean filling jointly, but can be waived with circumstatial evidence, like i mentioned above.

You are 100% correct. The problem here is that she has not been battered, or at least has not disclosed such events here.
 
hi everyone,
thanks for your immense support,firstly let me correct an error, joeie2000 is my sister and when i registered and posted my ordeal, i left to attend to other stuff, when i came back i didn't realize she had logged in the forum, so i sent a post and it came in her username, i tried rectifying it but already got a response,also couldn't continue posting yesterday because my husband came home, didn't mean to cause confusion.back to my ordeal, right now as i write we are not on speaking terms, the most painful part of the whole thing is that i have spent almost all my savings, godisgoodtome he stated his mothers name in the application but also stated deceased,then her birth dated he wrote unknown, i'm so confused as to what to do, do i hang onto this nightmare because as it is now he feels like i'm boxed into a corner and really has no choice, as for his son he said he was there at birth and his name is on the birth certificate but heard that the mother cheated during there dating time so as far as he is concerned the child is not his, but that is an obvious lie because the picture i saw has a date on the back of it [02/04/07]
 
also i want to keep all my options open at this point, aspapi, my ex husband is not a usc neither is he a permanent resident, he does not live in this country, we were married for 5yrs and half, i have been visiting the usa since 2000 on b2 but over stayed my visa in 2005 when i started having problems with ex. As for current hobby, we live together and he had a job when i met him.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
i just want to say thanks to all of you, i intend to buckle up and help myself in this situation, i intend to go consult with an attorney and see what he says, i will keep updating my situation because at this time i do not trust him at all.
 
Thought

You can consult a lawyer if you like.But i think that you are stuck in that situation unless you got a divorce.You have not been abused or battered ,you were taken advantage of.Men and women lie all the time and i do not believe a Judge would grant you an unconditional green card during a divorce.USCIS would not care that he lied and they will scrutinize you based on the past.Good luck sorry to be pessimistic.
 
Top