My Wife Tricked Me To Marry Her

A

Aboki

Registered Users (C)
Hey Guys,

I am so glad i found this forum i have read most of the topics on here and i feel comfortable about asking my question which i am hoping i will get some reasonable answers.

I have been married to this lady going on 3 years now, we met on the internet and when i met her she didn't tell me about her medical conditions yea she told me she had depression but in my understand it's wasn't some mental illness , hey come everybody has depression.... A week after my arrival i started notice some strange attitude about my wife, she wakes up in the middle of the night crying, gets angry for no reason, shouts and all sort of things, i and her parents ended up taking her to the emergency room(psychiatric hospital) when she became unbearable and dangerous where she was diagnosed of schizophrenia she stayed in the mental hospital for about 3weeks and was later discharged now she taking her medications.

After she got released from the psychiatric hospital i asked her why didn't she tell me about her schizophrenia before we got married she said that if she had told me i would not have married her, i said but you should have told me upfront to know what i am coming to deal with here in America. She had been to admitted to 3 different psychiatric hospital in the past 6years even before we got married she had been to some mental hospital but she didn't tell me about it i am just finding that out now.....We were at the mental health hospital today to pick up her medicines her therapist called me and asked me question about our marriage like am i aware of her condition i said yea but after we got married, her therapist further said were you aware before you married her i said NO.. The therapist made me understood that she told her parents to tell me upfront about her medical history before we got married but they didn't.

Now i am over here in a situation where i can't help myself i don't know what to do, the worse part of the story is my wife's mother tells my wife not to trust me take the checks out of our room and her debit card too that i could take money out her account, she put a block on the phone i can't call my family back home unless i ask her, i had a cell but they told me to send the cell phone back because i am not working that i can't pay for it, the point is they don't wanna see talking on the phone with someone if i stay long on the computer they see something wrong with it. It feels like i am being captivated in here.........

Out of my curiosity i contacted an immigration lawyer i told me about my situation and he said i could apply for self petition as a battered or cruelty abused spouse of the USC if i can proof that she truly has schizophrenia the therapist is willing to help me get some medical papers that shows that she is mentally ill.... Right now i do not want to do i don't want to tell my mum about the situation i am in because if i do she will get so worried about me i am her only son plus i am young in my early 20's.... Do you all think if i file for the I-360 self petition am i in my right or what should i do. I got here on a K3 visa

Please guys advice, your advice will be greatly appreciated.
 
Provide details on immigration...

Hi,

Nothing in your post provides information about your immigration process or status, but how nutty your wife has been to you...:confused: I am not in a position to opine without knowing the clear facts of your case....:rolleyes:
 
He entered on a K-3 visa and married some psyco american... you have not received your GC yet? If you are married 2+ years you should have received an unconditional GC, which one did you get?
 
I gat here on a K3 visa and haven't filed for EAD/AOS......I am thinking of filing I-360 self petition as the lawyer said... I am just a K3 visa holder right now... They said K3 holder can't get conditional GC unless you are a K1 holder, i am not sure pls correct me if i am wrong
 
Aboki, looks to me that indeed you'd be eligible to file I-360 (and since your wife is a US citizen, you can file concurrently for AOS). However, in my layman opinion the evidence for "battered or subject to extreme cruelty" by an abusive spouse is a stretch in this case. What specifically do you consider extremely cruel and abusive about your situation?

The provision in I-360 also includes that you have to be a person whose removal or deportation would result in extreme hardship to yourself, I'm not sure how this applies either.

Here's some "suggested evidence" from the I-360 instructions:

Evidence of the abuse, such as reports and affidavits from police, judges and other court officials, medical personnel,school officials, clergy, social workers, and other social service agency personnel. If you have an order of protection or have taken other legal steps to end the abuse, you should submit copies of those court documents.

Affidavits, birth certificates of children, medical reports and other relevant credible evidence of the extreme hardship that would result if you were to be removed or deported.

So what's your plan? File for AOS and then get a divorce? What's holding you in this country anyway, other than your marriage? I also don't see anything in the instructions about abusive behavior by parents in law, it's about abusive behavior by the spouse. So far all I can see is that your spouse is suffering from a mental illness, she is presumably a danger to you because of her illness, but is that either abusive or extremely cruel on her behalf?

About your other question, my understanding is that in K-3 status in the US, you can file for AOS at any time, provided you have a good faith marriage with a US citizen, and it will be considered conditional if you're married for less than 2 years. There should be an I-130 on file for you before you came here, and you'd have to file I-485 and optionally the forms for EAD and AP. My understanding is that you could have done this as soon as you entered this country. However, you have to determine for yourself if a good faith marriage still exists between the two of you, it's not clear to me what your and your wife's intent is.
 
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Thanks for your contribution austriacus, When i spoke the immigration attorney he said i could be eligible for the I-360 that the marriage was entered in good faith but turns out to be disaster, the attorney said as long i can proof that she has schizophrenia. I can get her medical reports from her hospitals and her therapist who is willing to help me through the process and a copy of a petition i filed with a probate court..... What are the relevant credible evidence of the extreme hardship that would result if i was to be removed or deported and how do i take a legal step to end the abuse?

When i arrived here we had financial problem, right now she is taking her medicine i am scared to file for AOS with her she might mess up at the AOS interview because sometimes she talks out of the line even as she is on the medication and there is a possibility that she might go back to the psychiatric hospital which i am not pray for.... I don't want to go back to my country because i gave up a lot of things to come down here just to be with her not knowing it's going to be a disaster..


Do you think i should go ahead and file for the I-360 or what should i do. When i spoke the immigration attorney i was told it's a possibility that i can file for it but on the other hand some lawyers don't care if you get approved or not all they want is their money that is why i am asking you guys on here to please guide me on what to do.
 
Aboki, here's my unprofessional opinion of your situation, and please also take other's opinion into consideration which could be different.

I see the facts as follows:

(1) you seem to be very interested in having a GC, yet it does not appear to me that at this point you still have a good faith marriage; so if you were to file AOS at this moment through the regular process based on the I-130 I would consider it fraudulent, because you would do it solely to get an immigration benefit.
(2) you'd like to file I-360 based on abusive spouse/subjection to extreme cruelty but I don't see any credible evidence. Do the medical reports prove any "abuse"? If they only prove she has a mental condition, my opinion is that you have a wife with a mental disability, but that's not abuse. Many people are married to disabled persons and love them for who they are. Has she actually abused you in some way (physical, mental)? And do you have evidence? Usually these are the cases where the police has to come to calm down the abuser etc. and there would be police reports, or you have physical injury that you have a medical report for, etc, or restraining orders have been filed, ...
(3) in my opinion, the toughest one would be to prove extreme hardship for you. These are typically applicable if you have a medical condition preventing you from leaving the country, or if you have children that need to be taken care of, etc. In your case, I don't know much about you, but so far you haven't demonstrated any extreme hardship. If anything I think you have fairly strong ties to your home country (only son worried about mom, feel like capitvated here, ...).

The way I look at it, you're trying to petition for a family based AOS where no credible bona fide family relationship exists. The irony is, if you already were a LPR, you'd have an unconditional GC now and the government wouldn't care if you divorced at this point. But, since you're still a nonimmigrant and haven't filed for AOS yet, I don't see how you can still petition in the family based category, especially since I don't see you'd have any "extreme hardship" if you don't become an LPR.

If you would like to stay and eventually become an LPR, my opinion is you'd be better off applying in another way. Perhaps you can adjust to H-1B and get an employment based green card. Perhaps you'll meet another US citizen that you'd like to share the rest of your life with, you're still young. In my opinion it's time for you either to stick with this relationship because you love your wife, or to move on!

If someone else has a different opinion/interpretation please contribute!
 
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austriacus said:
Aboki, here's my unprofessional opinion of your situation, and please also take other's opinion into consideration which could be different.

I see the facts as follows:

(1) you seem to be very interested in having a GC, yet it does not appear to me that at this point you still have a good faith marriage; so if you were to file AOS at this moment through the regular process based on the I-130 I would consider it fraudulent, because you would do it solely to get an immigration benefit.
(2) you'd like to file I-360 based on abusive spouse/subjection to extreme cruelty but I don't see any credible evidence. Do the medical reports prove any "abuse"? If they only prove she has a mental condition, my opinion is that you have a wife with a mental disability, but that's not abuse. Many people are married to disabled persons and love them for who they are. Has she actually abused you in some way (physical, mental)? And do you have evidence? Usually these are the cases where the police has to come to calm down the abuser etc. and there would be police reports, or you have physical injury that you have a medical report for, etc, or restraining orders have been filed, ...
(3) in my opinion, the toughest one would be to prove extreme hardship for you. These are typically applicable if you have a medical condition preventing you from leaving the country, or if you have children that need to be taken care of, etc. In your case, I don't know much about you, but so far you haven't demonstrated any extreme hardship. If anything I think you have fairly strong ties to your home country (only son worried about mom, feel like capitvated here, ...).

The way I look at it, you're trying to petition for a family based AOS where no credible bona fide family relationship exists. The irony is, if you already were a LPR, you'd have an unconditional GC now and the government wouldn't care if you divorced at this point. But, since you're still a nonimmigrant and haven't filed for AOS yet, I don't see how you can still petition in the family based category, especially since I don't see you'd have any "extreme hardship" if you don't become an LPR.

If you would like to stay and eventually become an LPR, my opinion is you'd be better off applying in another way. Perhaps you can adjust to H-1B and get an employment based green card. Perhaps you'll meet another US citizen that you'd like to share the rest of your life with, you're still young. In my opinion it's time for you either to stick with this relationship because you love your wife, or to move on!

If someone else has a different opinion/interpretation please contribute!
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Thank you very much, i truly appreciate your advices. Yea i was thinking about too that having mental problem doesn't show how she has abused me physically or mentally like i said lawyers do not care if get approved or not all they want is to make some $$$ from you.... I am going to be honest here i really do not want to spend the rest of my life with this kind of woman it's a big problem to me i might not see it now but in the nearest future it is, if she had told me this before we married or when we first met i wouldn't put myself in this situation.....For some reason i feel like my wife and her family tricked me to marry their daughter because they were aware of her medical conditions but they didn't let me know about..... I am young and i still want to finish my school i have something to do with my life not to start dealing with this kind of issue at my age..... I am K3 holder is it possible to adjust to H-1B visa, are there other ways for a K3 holder to adjust status and remain in the US legally?

Thank you again
 
Aboki, of course you can adjust to H-1B, it is a dual intent visa so the immigrant intent you've shown (when an I-130 petition was filed for you) doesn't affect your ability to adjust to H-1B. You need a job that requires at minimum a bachelor's degree (and you need to have such a degree too). H-1B is somewhat complicated these days because much fewer visas are available than applicants. If you're luckly, the earliest you could start in H-1B is Oct next year, but it's not guaranteed, if you have a graduate degree your chances are higher.

If you want to study, the perfect status for you would be F-1, however this would be very difficult to get once you've shown immigrant intent. Maybe someone can comment, if his basis for immigrant intent goes away (i.e. he would divorce his wife), is there a chance he would be eligible for F-1 again? Or once you've shown immigrant intent, no more F-1 for life?
 
PraetorianXI said:
For some cultures... specially those of arranged marriages, love is not part of the equation. :rolleyes:
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I am sorry if it looks or sound like an arranged marriage it is not arranged i truly had feeling for her when we met plus if she had been upfront with me about her medical situation all of this wouldn't be happening now.. All i ask for is some good advice here as i say again i can not spend the rest of my life with a woman like that and i do not wanna loose my status......You all put yourselves in my shoes and tell me how you would feel, when you met your wife and she lied about her medical conditions come to find out that she has been suffering from a severe mental illness like schizophrenia and tell me how you would feel if you still like to spend the rest of your life with a woman like that.... Is there a way a K3 holder to adjust to a H-1B visa
 
I was not pointing to your situation. It was more of a blanket statement. A relationship built one one BIG lie, will not likely succeed. I am sorry for you.
 
Aboki, you can legally adjust to H-1B as I said, but the timing might be difficult. I believe that in order to preserve your K3 status, you need to remain married to your wife, correct? So you'd have to be married still until you adjust to H-1B.
 
austriacus said:
Aboki, of course you can adjust to H-1B, it is a dual intent visa so the immigrant intent you've shown (when an I-130 petition was filed for you) doesn't affect your ability to adjust to H-1B. You need a job that requires at minimum a bachelor's degree (and you need to have such a degree too). H-1B is somewhat complicated these days because much fewer visas are available than applicants. If you're luckly, the earliest you could start in H-1B is Oct next year, but it's not guaranteed, if you have a graduate degree your chances are higher.

If you want to study, the perfect status for you would be F-1, however this would be very difficult to get once you've shown immigrant intent. Maybe someone can comment, if his basis for immigrant intent goes away (i.e. he would divorce his wife), is there a chance he would be eligible for F-1 again? Or once you've shown immigrant intent, no more F-1 for life?
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I have seen a situation where K3 visa entered the US, he had his EAD but didn't apply for AOS.. Divorce with the initial petitioner before he filed for AOS, later marry another USC now they are adjusting their status... Isn't that applicable in my situation Can't i divorce and re-marry another USC then adjust my status to LPR from my new marriage ???? The get more responses i get the more confuse i am getting....
 
Aboki, sure, the full range of employment or family based immigration options are open to you. You can of course marry another USC and adjust status, provided it's a good faith marriage. I'm not sure about the details of how you would preserve a legal status, i.e. in the time between when you're divorced and when you marry again. But anyway, if you marry another USC, any illegal presence you accumulate will be forgiven.
 
Come to think of it, if you happen to qualify in an EB category with a current priority date, you may not even need H-1B, and could go directly to AOS. You'd need a sponsoring employer, which may be difficult to find without having worked for one. Can you get employment authorization in K-3 status without filing for AOS?
 
austriacus said:
Aboki, sure, the full range of employment or family based immigration options are open to you. You can of course marry another USC and adjust status, provided it's a good faith marriage. I'm not sure about the details of how you would preserve a legal status, i.e. in the time between when you're divorced and when you marry again. But anyway, if you marry another USC, any illegal presence you accumulate will be forgiven.
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Thank you very much austriacus you have been a wonderful help to me so far and i truly appreciate it i will contact the lawyer again ask her if we could go by that route... It's going to be the best option so far it we can adjust status this way...... Once again thank you and God bless you.
 
I didn't know doctors talk about their patients ongoing medical conditions with anyone even spouses unless with the permission of the patient.
 
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